Zamkati
- Surefire njira zolimbitsira ubale wanu nthawi zikayamba kukhala zovuta
- 1. Kumvetsera mwachidwi
- 2. Kusungirana malo wina ndi mzake kuti akhale ndi mphindi yakugwa
- 3. Perekani / Funsani thandizo
- 4. Tsiku lausiku
- 5. Sonyezani kuyamikirana ndi kuyamika wina ndi mnzake
- 6. Pezani maluso athanzi, ndikuthandizana kuthana
Pa February 14, 2018, kuwombera koopsa kusukulu kunachitika mphindi 15 kuchokera kunyumba kwanga, pasanathe mphindi 5 kuchokera kusukulu yasekondale ya mwana wanga wamkazi ndipo mphindi 15 kuchokera pomwe ndimachita zachinsinsi ku Boca Raton.
Kuyambira pamenepo, nthawi yanga yambiri yaulere idaperekedwa kuti ndithandizire achinyamata, aphunzitsi ndi makolo. Ndinakhalanso membala wa bungwe lopanda phindu lothandizira kuthandiza anthu ammudzi. M'mwezi wa Marichi, ine ndi mwamuna wanga tidatseka nyumba yathu yatsopano ndipo tidakonzeka kusamuka. Sabata yomwe tinalandira mafungulo inali mlungu womwe anthu awiri amadzipha chifukwa chodzipha ku Parkland.
Chifukwa chiyani ndikukuwuzani zonsezi?
Kukhala ndi ana awiri (osakwana zaka 4), kukhala wothandizira mdera lomwe lidakhudzidwa ndimavuto oterewa, ndikusamutsira nyumba yanu nthawi yomweyo kumatha kubweretsa zovuta muubwenzi uliwonse, ndipo athu sanali osiyana. Nthawi zotere pamakhala zinthu zoti muchite muubwenzi wanu kuti mupulumuke nthawi zovuta.
Surefire njira zolimbitsira ubale wanu nthawi zikayamba kukhala zovuta
Panali nthawi zovuta, zovuta komanso kusagwirizana pamomwe tingagwiritsire ntchito nthawi yathu ndikuthana ndi magawo osiyanasiyana m'miyoyo yathu. Izi zimandibweretsa kumutu wa blog iyi - Kodi maanja athanzi amathetsa bwanji nthawi zovuta?
M'malingaliro mwanga, chinthu choyamba muyenera kuzindikira kuti ubalewo ndi ntchito ya tsiku ndi tsiku.
Ngati mukufuna kukhala ndiubwenzi wolimba, wabwino ndi anzanu ena mumakhala mukuwugwirira ntchito tsiku ndi tsiku.
Anthu ena atha kunena okha tsopano - tsiku ndi tsiku? Inde! Tsiku ndi tsiku! Kulongosola kwachidule kwa mawuwa ndikuti ngati aliyense muubwenzi awonetsetsa kuti akwaniritsa zosowa za wokondedwa wawo kotero ali osangalala ndi chikondi ndi chithandizo chopanda malire ndiye kuti palibe chifukwa chomwe onse sangakhale achimwemwe koposa, chabwino?
Ndapeza nkhani yabwinoyi pano, koma nazi maupangiri omwe ndapeza othandiza munthawi yamavuto athu.
Ndikudziwa kuti ndizosavuta kuzichita kuposa kuchita, koma ngati mungakhalebe ogwirizana ndi zina mwazochita izi ndikukhulupirira kuti mutha kuthana ndi chilichonse ndipo chingokupangitsani banja lolimba! Izi ndi njira zothandiza kuthana ndi mavuto pachibwenzi chanu.
Awiriwo Dr. Gottman adalemba kafukufuku wambiri pamutuwu.
1. Kumvetsera mwachidwi
Ena a ife timamverera mopepuka ndikuphonya zambiri zomwe zingathandize chibwenzicho. Mukakhala osamvera mnzanu, zinthu zimatha kukhala zovuta komanso zokhumudwitsa ndipo zimatha kuyambitsa zinthu kukulira.
2. Kusungirana malo wina ndi mzake kuti akhale ndi mphindi yakugwa
Momwemo, tiyenera kuyesetsa kukhala odekha komanso oleza mtima ndi anzathu.
Komabe, tikapanikizika, nthawi zina mmodzi kapena onse awiri atha kupsa mtima komanso kudekha. Izi sizabwino, koma tonse ndife anthu ndipo titha kuthana ndi mavuto nthawi zina.
Yesetsani kumvetsetsa ndikuthandizira izi zikachitika. Yesetsani kukhala madzi, pamene mukumva kuti mnzanu ndi moto. Khululukirani ngati kuli kofunika ndipo musasungire chakukhosi ndi kuvomereza kuti mwalakwitsa.
3. Perekani / Funsani thandizo
Kupempha thandizo kuchokera kwa anzathu (ngakhale achibale athu) munthawi yamavuto kungapangitse kuti zinthu zikhale zosavuta. Kudziwitsa mnzanu kuti mukukumana ndi zovuta zitha kuwapatsa mwayi wokhala omvetsetsa komanso oleza mtima. Kuzindikira kuti muli pamavuto kungathandize kulumikizana nako. Kuyankhulana ndikofunikira kwambiri.
4. Tsiku lausiku
Makamaka zinthu zikavuta. Sichiyenera kukhala chodula, koma nthawi yabwino popanda zosokonezedwa ndi ana, abwenzi, abale, ndi zina zambiri.
Kupeza nthawi yolumikizirana ndikuchepetsa nthawi ndikofunikira. Ubwenzi ndi gawo lake; kugonana kumatha kupanga zinthu bwino. Sangalalani limodzi ndikuchita zinthu zomwe simunachite kwa nthawi yayitali.
5. Sonyezani kuyamikirana ndi kuyamika wina ndi mnzake
Ngakhale zili choncho, mnzanuyo amadziwa kuti mumamukonda, onetsetsani kuti mukuwakumbutsa pogwiritsa ntchito chilankhulo chawo chachikondi (sindikudziwa kuti ndi chiyani? Mafunso apa). Kupangitsa wina kumverera kuti amakondedwa ndi kuyamikiridwa kungathandize kwambiri panthawi yamavuto.
6. Pezani maluso athanzi, ndikuthandizana kuthana
Kukhala ndi nthawi yokhayokha yochitira zinthu zomwe mumakonda komanso zomwe anzanu sangakonde kulinso kwathanzi. Kucheza ndi anyamata / atsikana kamodzi ndikulimbitsa ubale nthawi zambiri, kumathandiza kukhulupirirana.
Ngati zikukuvutani kuti mupeze luso la kuthana ndi mavuto anu nokha mutha kupempha thandizo kunja kuti muwone othandizira omwe amagwiritsa ntchito maanja. Ngati muli ndi funso lililonse ine kapena wina wa gulu langa atha kuthandiza pano.