Zamkati
- 1. Kulankhulana bwino
- 2. Lankhulani momasuka za zomwe mukuyembekezera
- 3. Sanjani zochita zanu
- 4. Yambani ndinu kuchitapo kanthu
- 5. Osayerekezera moyo wanu wogonana
- 6. Osamanyalanyaza wokondedwa wanu musanachite kapena mutagonana
- 7. Yesani malingaliro a kunja kwa bokosi
Kugonana ndi gawo labwino m'banja lililonse, popeza maanja okondana amatha kusangalala kukhala limodzi kwa zaka zambiri. Koma kodi mumadziwa kuti pali mtundu wogonana "woyenera" ndi "wolakwika"? Inde. Makhalidwe apadera ndiofunikira kuti mukhale ndi chibwenzi chogonana.
Pakhoza kukhala kuchepa kwa kugonana muubwenzi wanu kapena mutha kukhala pachibwenzi chosagonana ngakhale osazindikira.
Nanga zizindikiro za chiwerewere ndi ziti? Ndapanga mndandanda wazomwezi, zomwe mudzaone pansipa koma tisanayang'ane izi.
Zomwe kafukufuku akunena ...
Kugonana m'banja ndikofunikira kwambiri komwe kumalimbikitsa kukhutitsidwa ndi banja ndikupindulitsanso thanzi lanu. Malinga ndi ofufuza aku University of Chicago Adena Galinsky ndi Linda J. omwe adafunsa mabanja 732 azaka zapakati pa 57 mpaka 85 zakuchuluka kwakugonana, thanzi lam'mutu komanso kukhutira ndi banja, "Kuti titeteze banja mtsogolo, kungakhale kofunika kuti achikulire apeze njira zopitilira pakugonana, monganso momwe mavuto azaumoyo amapangitsira zovuta kapena zovuta kuzolowera kugonana."
Koma funso apa ndiloti kuchuluka kwa kugonana ndi koyenera m'banja? General Social Survey ikuti anthu apabanja amagonana maulendo 58 pachaka pafupifupi. Ngati nambala yanu ili patali kuposa chiwerengerochi chomwe chatchulidwa pano, ndiye kuti ichi ndi chimodzi mwazizindikiro zogonana.
Koma, bola ngati muli ndi ubale wogonana ndi wokondedwa wanu, ndiye kuti palibe chifukwa chodandaulira. M'malo mwake, muyenera kukhala ndi chidwi chakuzindikira ngati kugonana kwanu ndi mnzanuyo kukupangitsani kukhala kosayenera.
Chifukwa chake, samalani ngati mupeza zina mwazizindikiro muukwati wanu.Komanso, kumbukirani, izi zodetsa nkhawa zogonana zitha kuwonekera nthawi iliyonse, kaya ndi tsiku lanu loyamba kapena mutatha zaka makumi awiri muli m'banja.
Ziribe kanthu kuti zikuwonekera liti, mchitidwe wogonana wowopsa kapena wowopsa kapena kuwonekera kwa khalidweli ndichinthu chomwe muyenera kuthana nacho nthawi yomweyo. Nthawi zina, kudzichotsa muubwenzi ndi / kapena kukakamira kuti mupeze chithandizo chamankhwala ndiye chisankho chabwino.
Akatswiri amati kugonana sikuyenera -
- Muzimva kuti mukukakamizidwa, kukakamizidwa, kapena kukakamizidwa
- Khalani onyenga
- Phatikizani zinthu kapena zochitika zomwe simukukhulupirira kuphatikiza kapena kugwiritsa ntchito
- Khalani opweteka pokhapokha ngati kupweteka kuli mbali ya chisangalalo
- Khalani achikondi, kapena opanda chikondi
- Khalani wokakamiza
- Khalani akutali
- Onetsani zonyoza (osaphatikizira zochitika zina zovomerezana)
- Chitani zomwe wina achite "Kwa" wina
- Gwiritsani ntchito chida, kapena kubwezedwa ngati chilango
- Khalani obisa
- Pangani munthu kuti azitsogolera moyo wapawiri
Akatswiri amavomereza kuti kugonana kuyenera -
- Khalani ogwirizana
- Sonyezani chikondi
- Khalani okambirana
- Khalani olamulidwa komanso owongoleredwa
- Khalani ogwirizana komanso okondana
- Khalani okondana, ogawana, komanso ofanana
- Khalani oyendetsa mwachilengedwe, osakakamiza
- Khalani opatsa mphamvu
- Khalani ofanana
- Limbikitsani kudzidalira komanso kudzidalira
- Khalani odalirika, otetezeka, ndi aulemu
Kutsatira mfundo zingapo zomwe tazitchula pamwambapa, chofunikira kwambiri mwa izi ndikulankhulana momasuka ndi wokondedwa wanu. Tsopano tiyeni timvetsetse njira khumi zakugonana.
1. Kulankhulana bwino
Kugonana kuyenera kukhala nkhani yomwe awiriwo angathe kukambirana momasuka. Pasapezeke zinsinsi, manyazi, kapena chiweruzo chokhudzana ndi zogonana kapena zogonana.
Kugonana kuyenera kuphatikizapo kukondana ndipo kuyenera kukhala kosangalatsa nthawi zonse. Ziyenera kukhala zomwe mumachita kuti musangalatse wina ndi mnzake m'njira yogawana.
Ngati zochitika zogonana kapena zachiwerewere monga zolaula, chinyengo, kukakamiza, kuwanyengerera, kapena kuwapatsa chilango (mwachitsanzo, kuletsa kugonana), zikupezeka pachibwenzi chanu, kapena ngakhale pali zina zomwe zimakukhudzani, kambiranani vutolo ndi mnzanuyo kapena funsani upangiri waukwati kuchokera kwa omwe ali ndi chilolezo chogonana kapena mlangizi wazokwatirana.
2. Lankhulani momasuka za zomwe mukuyembekezera
Musanyoze kufunika kogonana m'banja lanu. Ngati mukufuna kusangalala ndi kugonana ndi wokondedwa wanu, muyenera kufotokoza zomwe mukuyembekezera komanso zomwe mukufuna. Ziyembekezero zogonana zosakwaniritsidwa zitha kupweteketsa ubale.
Ngati sizikugwirizana pa banja lanu, ndibwino kuti muwonetse zofuna zanu mwanzeru -
- Zinthu zomwe zingakupangitseni kumva bwino, ndipo
- Zinthu zomwe mukuyang'ana kuchipinda.
3. Sanjani zochita zanu
Moyo wokonda zachilengedwe umasiya nthawi yokwanira kuti maanja agwirizane. Masiku amapita, ndipo samasinthana pafupipafupi mawu ochepa, ndipo kugonana kumatenga mpando wakumbuyo.
Koma, kukondana ndi mnzanuyo kumatha kukhala chinthu chosangalatsa kupsinjika, akutero kafukufuku. Komanso, pali maubwino ena osaneneka okhala ndi ubale wogonana. Chifukwa chake, yesetsani kuti musamachite zogonana pansi pazomwe muyenera kuchita.
Ndikofunika kukonza zogonana m'malo mwake.
Mabanja ena amakhala kutali ndi lingaliro lakukonzekera kugonana koma kukonzekera kumawonjezera chisangalalo ndikupanga chiyembekezo. Ngati mukukonzekera kutentha ndi kutentha pakati pa mapepala usikuuno, perekani malingaliro kuyambira m'mawa, mwina kudzera m'malemba kapena manja okopa.
Wokondedwa wanu amadikirira mwachidwi zodabwitsa zomwe mwina mudzawaponyera magetsi atazima.
4. Yambani ndinu kuchitapo kanthu
Musayembekezere kuti wokondedwa wanu ayambe kukambirana nkhani zachiwerewere kapena kuyambitsa chikondi nthawi zonse mukakhala limodzi. Onse ali ndi udindo wofanana wosangalala ndi chibwenzi chogonana.
Gwiranani manja, onetsani chikondi, nthawi ndi nthawi, pitani kokacheza tsiku ndi tsiku, ndikuchita zina zochepa kuti moto wa chikondi uzikula.
5. Osayerekezera moyo wanu wogonana
Simungayembekezere kugonana kukhala chinthu chodabwitsa nthawi iliyonse mukamayesa. Ndipo, musayembekezere kuti moyo wanu wogonana uwoneke ngati wotentha monga momwe amawonetsera m'makanema.
Pali kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa makanema ndi zenizeni. Chifukwa chake, siyani kuyerekezera moyo wanu wogonana ndi zomwe zimachitika m'mafilimu ndi ma TV. Wokondedwa wanu sadzakwaniritsa zomwe mukuyembekezera, zomwe ndizosatheka komanso zamankhwala.
6. Osamanyalanyaza wokondedwa wanu musanachite kapena mutagonana
Mukuyenera kuti mupeze maupangiri ambiri amomwe mungachitire zogonana pachibwenzi. Koma, simungasangalale ndi chibwenzi chogonana ngati mupitilira kunyalanyaza mnzanu. Panthawi yomwe mumamva kuti mumakhala omasuka nawo, amakhala atataya kale chidwi chokhala nawo pafupi.
7. Yesani malingaliro a kunja kwa bokosi
Kuyesa malo omwewo mobwerezabwereza kumatha kukhala kosasangalatsa komanso kotopetsa nthawi ina m'banja lanu. Koma, mutha kusunga zochitika zanu pakati pa mapepala ndikupita kupitirira malo anu abwino ndikuwunika njira zina.
Yesani malo atsopano ogonana ndi zisudzo kuti zinthu zizikhala zosangalatsa komanso zolimbikitsa, nthawi yomweyo.
Ndipo, pali njira zina zosangalalira ndi ubale wogonana. Izi zikuphatikiza -
- Kulemekezana wina ndi mnzake
- Kusungilana chikondano wina ndi mnzake
- Kusamalira thanzi lanu logonana
Kuyankhula zogonana pachibwenzi chatsopano sikophweka ndipo kukambirana zogonana ndi munthu amene mwangokumana naye sikulangizidwa. Koma iyi ndi nkhani imodzi yomwe muyenera kutchula musanaganize zokhala ndi munthuyo.