Zamkati
Kodi tanthauzo lachiyanjano ndi chiyani?
Kutanthauzira mawu kumatanthauza “kukondana” monga kuyandikana kapena kugonana, koma kodi mumadziwa kuti pali njira zinanso zofotokozera zaubwenzi?
Njira yosangalatsa yofotokozera zaubwenzi ingakhale, kuphatikiza mitima. Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi wokondedwa wathu kumatilola kuti “tiwone” omwe okondedwa athu alidi ndipo zimapangitsa mnzathu kuti "awonenso" kwa ife.
Chomwe muyenera kudzifunsa ndikuti: Kodi ubwenzi umatanthauza chiyani kwa ine? Izi zitha kukhala tanthauzo lakukondana mokhudzana ndi banja kapena ubale uliwonse. Kufotokozera zaubwenzi ndiko kudziwa momwe nonse mumakhudzirana.
Ubwenzi watanthauzo
Kodi tanthauzo lachiyanjano ndi chiyani? Kodi ubwenzi weniweni ndi chiyani? Ndipo kodi kukhala pachibwenzi popanda kugonana ndikotheka?
Ena mu psychology masiku ano amawona ubale wapabanja kukhala wopitilira muyeso kapena kukhala pachibwenzi. Kutanthauzira koona kwaubwenzi sikutanthauza matupi awiri okha ophatikizana kapena kuthupi, ndizakuya kuposa pamenepo.
'Kodi chibwenzi ndi chiani' kapena 'Kodi kukondana m'banja' kungakhale ndi tanthauzo lotani kwa anthu osiyanasiyana.
Lingaliro la kukondana kumaphatikizapo kukhala ogwirizana pomwe anthu awiri amabwezerana nthawi yakukondana komanso kukhulupirirana, kukondana, komanso kuthupi.
Onaninso:
Nawa matanthauzidwe akulu anayi aubwenzi ndi zomwe akutanthauza kwa inu:
1. Ubwenzi wapamtima
Kodi nonse muli chimodzimodzi? Kodi mumamvana? Kodi mungalankhule 'mpaka maola onse usiku za chilichonse ndi chilichonse - ngakhale zinthu ngati ana ndi ndalama? Izi ndizomwe zikutanthauza tanthauzo la chibwenzi chamaphunziro.
Sikuti munthu m'modzi waluntha kuposa mnzake; koposa kuti mukhale ndi njira yofananira pamoyo ndikusangalala kucheza. Mutha kukhala ndi malingaliro osiyanasiyana, koma mumayesetsa kuti mubwere limodzi.
Kupatula kukondana kwakuthupi ndi kwamaganizidwe kuti ubale ukhale wopambana, chibwenzi chimafunikira mulingo wina wanzeru zofananira pakati pa abwenzi.
Ubwenzi wapamtima ndipamene maanja amatha kuchita ndi kuthandizira miyoyo ya wina ndi mzake kudzera mu luntha lawo.
Malamulo aubwenzi waluntha amadalira kuti anthu omwe ali ndi luso lofananira amagwirizana.
Ndiye pali zinthu zingapo zofunika kuzikumbukira kuti mukulitse ubale wapamtima:
- Pezani ndikuchita nawo anthu omwe ali ndi malingaliro ndi zokhumba zomwezo monga zanu.
- Sakani anthu omwe ali ndi zokonda ndi zolinga zofanana.
- Kulumikizana ndi anthu omwe ali ndi mitundu yofananira yokhulupirika ndi zikhulupiliro.
2. Kuyandikira kwa mtima
Kodi tanthauzo lakukondana ndikutanthauza chiyani? Kapena kodi kukondana ndi chiyani?
Kukondana ndi maganizidwe m'banja ndi pamene awiriwo amakhala ndiubwenzi wolimba ndi wokondana wina ndi mnzake.
Ubwenzi wotere umadziwika ndi momwe awiriwo amakhala otetezeka, kukhala ndi chidaliro komanso kulumikizana.
Mukakhala okondana kwambiri, zikutanthauza kuti mumakhala pachiwopsezo. Mumaloleza chitetezo chanu ndikumverera kuti ndinu otetezeka potero.
Mukamva kuyandikana kotere, mutha kudziwitsana china chilichonse ndikumverera kuti mukulandiridwa. Nonse mutha "kumva" momwe mnzake akumvera.
Mabanja ambiri atha kukhala limodzi kwa nthawi yayitali komabe alibe kukondana. Ndi chifukwa chakuti mwina wowopsa kwambiri. Nthawi zambiri, samazindikira ngakhale kuchepa kwaubwenzi m'miyoyo yawo mpaka mochedwa kwambiri.
Nawa mafayilo a zinthu zochepa zomwe mungachite kuti mukulitse chikondi m'banja mwanu:
- Gwiritsani ntchito nthawi yabwino ndi mnzanu popanda zosokoneza.
- Khalani okoma mtima, aulemu, achikondi, ndi achifundo kwa wokondedwa wanu.
- Onani zinthu zatsopano ndi zochitika zomwe mungachite ndi mnzanu.
3. Mgwirizano wauzimu
Mwina chinthu chomaliza chomwe mumaganizira mukamva "kukondana" ndi uzimu. Koma ngati mukukhulupirira kuti Mulungu kapena mphamvu yayikulu amafuna kuti tizikondana, ndizomveka.
Sitinabwere mwangozi, ndipo mwanjira ina timapezana. Timapanga kulumikizana kwamphamvu. Mukakhala ndi mgwirizano wauzimu, nonse mumamvetsetsa zofuna zauzimu za wina ndi mnzake komanso zikhulupiriro zanu.
Mumalola kuti chibwenzicho chikhale ndi luso lauzimu.
Chifukwa chiyani sitikuvulaza ena, chifukwa ndi lamulo? Ayi, chifukwa timakhulupirira kuti moyo ndi wamtengo wapatali. Chimenecho ndicho chomangira chauzimu. Mukakwaniritsa izi muubwenzi wanu wapamtima, mumalumikizidwa ndi mnzanu, mwauzimu.
Ubwenzi wapamtima watanthauzo ndiye pamene awiriwa apangana kulemekeza, kusunga, ndi kupititsa patsogolo cholinga cha Mulungu cha miyoyo yawo.
Chibwenzi chauzimu nchachikulu komanso chakuya, ndipo chimakupangitsani inu ndi mnzanu kukhala odziwa bwino za inu nokha.
Zimakuphunzitsani kuti muziyamikira kupezeka kwa Mulungu ndi chifuniro chake mu banja lanu ndi miyoyo yanu. Zimalimbikitsa chikhulupiriro chanu cha wina wamkulu kuposa inu ndipo zimafuna kudzipereka pothetsa kudzikonda kwanu.
Nazi zinthu zochepa zomwe muyenera kuchita kuti mulemere miyoyo yanu, mwauzimu:
- Khulupirirani chinthu chapamwamba kuposa inu ndikuthandizana wina ndi mnzake kuti musinthe zomwe mumakhulupirira.
- Yesetsani kusinkhasinkha
- Lankhulani ndi mavuto anu amisala komanso momwe mungathetsere
4. Kuyankhula zogonana
Kukhala "pachibale" ndiko muzu wa mawu oti "kukondana," koma kodi izi zikutanthauza chiyani? Kodi ndi kugonana kokha, kapena kuposa pamenepo? Kodi pali kusiyana pakati pa kugonana ndi kukondana?
Kutanthauzira kwa chibwenzi muubwenzi ndikosiyana kwa maanja ndi banja.
Koma malingalirowa akukhudzana ndi chiwonetsero cha kugonana ngati nonse mumatha kukhala omasuka kufotokoza zakukhosi kwanu ndikukhala omasuka wina ndi mnzake ndiye kuti mwafika pachibwenzi chabwino.
Ndizoposa kugonana kokha-mukugawana gawo lanu lapaderadera kwambiri, ndipo mosemphanitsa.
Zokhudzana: Kodi Chiwerewere Ndi Chiyani? Njira 6 Zolumikizirana Pogonana
Kutenga kotsiriza
Zonsezi, mtundu uliwonse waubwenzi ndi njira. Ikhoza kusintha, chifukwa chake yesetsani kugwirira ntchito limodzi ndi mnzanuyo kuti mukhale ndiubwenzi wokhutiritsa komanso wokhutiritsa. Muthanso kufunsira upangiri wapamtima kuti mulimbikitse ubale wanu.
Malongosoledwe omwe agawidwa pamwambapa aubwenzi ndi zomwe akutanthauza kwa inu atha kukhala maziko abwino opangira kuyanjana kwamuyaya ndi anzanu.
Kutanthauzira ndikufufuza zaubwenzi m'magulu ambiri, ndiulendo wosangalatsa, womwe muyenera kuchita.