Zamkati
- Chifukwa chiyani chithandizo chokwatirana?
- Zizindikiro ziti zomwe muyenera kuyesa mankhwala?
- Mumanyozana wina ndi mzake pamakhalidwe
- Mumayesetsa kupeza zifukwa zopewera kugonana
- Mumamva mkwiyo ndi kunyoza mnzanu
- Simagawana malo amodzi mukakhala limodzi
- Mukuyesedwa kuti muchite chibwenzi
- Mumayamba kuyang'ana masamba azibwenzi
- Mumaganizira kuti kuyang'ana masamba azibwenzi kumangoyang'ana
- Inu kapena mnzanu mumangokhala chete
- Mukufuna kuphunzira njira zenizeni zopezera 'ol marital mojo
- Ziwerengerozo zili mbali yanu
Ukwati wanu sunkawoneka chonchi pomwe mudayamba. Kumayambiriro koyambirira, nonse munadikirira kuti mufike kunyumba kuchokera kuntchito kuti mukhale limodzi. Ngakhale ntchito zopanda ntchito monga kugula zinthu kapena kusanja zobwezeretsedwazo zimawoneka zosangalatsa, bola ngati mukuchita limodzi. Madzulo anu mudadzazidwa ndi kuseka ndikugawana. Mumadziwika mu gulu la anzanu ngati "banja lalikulu kwambiri", chitsanzo choti mutengere. Mwamseri, mumadziganizira nokha kuti banja lanu ndi banja labwino kwambiri kuposa anzanu onse ndipo mumamverera pang'ono.
Koma tsopano ndizosowa kuti mukuyembekezera kutsegula chitseko mutakhala tsiku lonse kuntchito. M'malo mwake, mumasaka zifukwa zosabwerera kunyumba. Mumathera nthawi yochuluka kumenyana ndi kusekako, ndipo ngakhale mutapempha zochuluka motani, zikuwoneka kuti nthawi zonse mumakhala mukubwezeretsanso chifukwa sangathe kudzichotsa pa Playstation yake kuti mabotolo achepetse nthawi yoti atenge . Simunaganize kuti mukuyenera kulandira mphotho ya "banja lalikulu kwambiri" nthawi yayitali.
Simunaganizirepopo za lingaliro lakusudzulana likadutsa m'malingaliro anu. Lingaliro limayamba kuyendera pafupipafupi kangapo. Kodi mukuganizira mofatsa za chisudzulo? Nanga bwanji zotsegulira kuthekera kwa chithandizo chokwatirana (chomwe nthawi zina chimatchedwa upangiri waukwati) musanayambe kuimbira foni maloya? Zingakhale kuti kubweretsa katswiri wothandizira kungakuthandizeni kuti mukhale banja labwino lomwe anzanu onse amafuna kukhala. Mwinanso kuwona wothandizira akubwezeretsanso kumverera kwachisangalalo.
Chifukwa chiyani chithandizo chokwatirana?
Ngati inu ndi mnzanu simukupita patsogolo kuthetsa mikangano ing'onoing'ono, wothandizira maukwati atha kukhala wopindulitsa. Mukutetezeka kwa ofesi yake, mupeza malo osalowerera ndale, opanda chiweruzo pomwe nonse mungafotokozere zakumva kwanu ndikumva kuti akumvedwa. Ngati mawu ayamba kukulira, wothandizira maukwati amatsitsa mawuwo kuti malingaliro azikhala okhazikika ndikumverera kuti kutuluke m'malo osalowerera ndale. Itha kukhala nthawi yoyamba komanso malo okhala kwa nthawi yayitali kuti aliyense azilankhula popanda wina kutuluka, kapena osakweza mawu.
Zizindikiro ziti zomwe muyenera kuyesa mankhwala?
Zokambirana zanu zimayenda mozungulira komanso mozungulira, popanda malingaliro opindulitsa omwe adaperekedwapo. Mwatopa kumufunsa kuti achotse bokosilo ndi kuyeretsa chisokonezo atakonza (pomaliza!) Mfuti yotayikayo. Watopa ndikukumvani kuti mukumukonzera kuti akonze mpope wotayikira. Mukuganiza kuti samayang'anira bomba lotayikira ngati sewero lamphamvu, njira yolangira china chake. Koma simukudziwa kuti china chake ndi chiyani chifukwa simungayankhulirane mwaulemu. Ndipo sikungokhala mfuti yotayikira yokha. Ndizinthu zamtundu uliwonse zomwe sizingathetsedwe. “Tsiku lililonse zimakhala zosokoneza. Nthawi zina ndimadabwa kuti ndinakwatirana ndi Wayne, ”anatero Sherry, wokongoletsa mkati wazaka 37. “Sindikukumbukira kuti izi zidachitika mchaka chathu choyamba tili limodzi. Koma tsopano ... moona mtima, sindikudziwa kuchuluka kwa kusamvana komwe kumakhalako komwe ndingatenge. ” Mkhalidwe wa Sherry umamveka bwino ngati kuwona wothandizira maukwati ndi Wayne kungapindulitse ukwatiwo.
Mumanyozana wina ndi mzake pamakhalidwe
Mukamakhala pagulu, mumacheperana kapena kunyozana, nthawi zina kumasintha maphwando kukhala ochepa mtima komanso osangalatsa kukhala osasangalatsa. Mumagwiritsa ntchito mwayi wopanga gululi kuti mupange zingwe zazing'ono kwa mnzanu. "Ndimangocheza", mutha kunena. Koma osati kwenikweni. Chidani chonse chomwe mwakhala mukusunga mobisa chikuwoneka kuti chimabwera mosavuta mukakhala ndi ena. Gulu kapena mnzanu amadziwa kuti ubale wanu ukhoza kukhala pamiyala, ndipo atha kunena china mwamseri kwa inu. M'malo mongogwiritsa ntchito anzanu kuti anene madandaulo anu, kupita kwa omwe amakuthandizani pa zaukwati kungakupatseni mpata wolankhula moona mtima zomwe zikukusowetsani mtendere, osati kungonamizira kuti "mumangocheza". Zimathandizanso kuti anzanu asakhale osasangalala komanso osadandaula za kutenga mbali pazokambirana zanu pagulu.
Mumayesetsa kupeza zifukwa zopewera kugonana
Kuchokera pachikale "osati usikuuno wokondedwa, ndadwala mutu," mpaka njira zamakono zopewera monga kuwonera Waya, ngati moyo wanu wogonana mulibe kapena wosakhutiritsa kapena nonse a inu, mungafune kukaonana ndi omwe amakuthandizani paukwati. Kugonana kumatha kukhala malire a chisangalalo cha banja kapena chisangalalo, chifukwa chake musanyalanyaze kuchepa kapena kusowa pachibwenzi. Izi zikuyenera kuthandizidwa ngati mukufuna kulumikizanso ndikusunga banja.
Mumamva mkwiyo ndi kunyoza mnzanu
"Ndikuwoneka kuti ndimangokhalira kusisitidwa ku Graham. Zinthu zomwe ndimakonda kuzipeza, monga momwe amapindira chopukutira, momwemo, osati gawo limodzi mwamagawo atatu, kodi mungakhulupirire? Ndiumunthu nthawi zina kukwiya nthawi zina, koma mukayamba kukwiya ndikunyoza mnzanuyo kwanthawi yayitali, muyenera kuzindikira kuti china chake chasintha ndikuti waluso waluso atha kukuthandizani kuti mupeze njira zopezera zomwe Unali banja losangalala komanso lokhutiritsa.
Simagawana malo amodzi mukakhala limodzi
Madzulo, kodi m'modzi wa inu mumakhala patsogolo pawayilesi yakanema pomwe winayo akuyang'ana pa intaneti paofesi yakunyumba? Kodi mumathera Loweruka lonse kupalira m'munda kuti mukhale nokha, osati chifukwa choti mukumangika ndikutsimikiza kuti mupambana mphotho ya "Best Garden in the 'Hood"? Kodi mumapuma mofulumira kuti mukawerenge nokha m'chipinda chanu pamene mnzanu akuwerengabe buku lake pabalaza? Mumadziuza nokha kuti sizachilendo kufuna malo enaake, koma kukhala m'nyumba imodzi ndi chisonyezo choti mukutaya kulumikizana kwanu. Wothandizira maukwati atha kukuthandizani kuti mubwererenso kukhala pafupi-pafupi pa sofa, kuseka kubwereza kwa "Anzanu" ndikupeza mapulogalamu atsopano owonera.
Mukuyesedwa kuti muchite chibwenzi
Mumapezeka kuti mumayamba kulota za mnzanu kuntchito. Mukusaka, kupeza, kenako uthenga wachinsinsi ndi zibwenzi zakale pa Facebook. "Poyamba, ndimaganiza kuti sizabwino kwenikweni momwe ndidalumikizirananso ndi zokonda zakale komanso anzanga akale pa Facebook," Suzy, 48, adachita chidwi. Anapitiliza kuti, "Abambo anga anali mu Gulu Lankhondo ndiye ndinali msilikali wankhondo, ndimangoyenda kuchokera pansi kupita pansi, boma kupita m'boma, ngakhale ku Europe. Ndinasiya anzanga m'malo onsewa, ndipo ndili wachinyamata, ndinasiya zibwenzi. Kuyanjananso nawo kwabweretsa zokumbukira zabwino zambiri, ndipo ... ndayamba kuganiza kuti mwina ndikufuna kukumana nawo makamaka ... ”mawu ake adatha.
Mumayamba kuyang'ana masamba azibwenzi
Mwayamba kufufuza zosiyanasiyanazi zomwe malowa akulonjeza ndipo mwina mwayamba kupanga mbiri yapaintaneti, kuti muwone zomwe zilipo. Brunette wachidwi, Teresa, anali asanawononge nthawi yambiri pa intaneti amakonda kusewera tenisi nthawi yake yaulere. Pazaka 57, anali asanakumaneko ndi aliyense pa intaneti, koma amuna awo, Carl, samawoneka ngati yemweyo yemwe adakwatirana naye kalekale. Amaganizira mozama kuti ino ikhoza kukhala nthawi yofufuza masamba azibwenzi. "Nditaya chiyani pakadali pano?" adafunsa, "Ndikutanthauza, mwina timayenera kupita kukaonana ndi okwatirana, koma ..." Mwamwayi, Teresa ndi Carl adapita kukaonana ndi wothandizira maukwati, ndipo Meyi watha adakondwerera tsiku lawo lasiliva.
Mumaganizira kuti kuyang'ana masamba azibwenzi kumangoyang'ana
Zowona, simupita kukacheza usiku uliwonse ndi mnzanu watsopano wapaintaneti. Mumalungamitsa machitidwe amtunduwu; Kupatula apo, amuna anu sakukukondaninso (osati kuti mukusangalatsidwa, mwina), kapena sanakuyamikireni miyezi ingapo. Mlangizi wa Physics yaku koleji, Becky, samangogwirizana ndi a Frank, amuna awo azaka khumi ndi zisanu ndi ziwiri. “Ndikudziwa kuti angafune kukonza zinthu, koma sindikudziwa ngati ali munthu woyenera amene ndikufuna kukhala naye moyo wanga wonse. Ndimayang'ana anyamatawa m'malo ena azibwenzi ndipo ndimamveka bwino kwambiri kuposa Frank. Ndikutanthauza, ndikungoyang'ana, koma ndikuyesedwa mwamphamvu. ” Musanadutse malire, funsani wothandizira zaukwati. Pambuyo pa magawo angapo ndikulankhula mosabisa, amatha kulingalira ngati ukwati wanu ungapulumuke kapena ayi. Masamba omwe azibwenzi amakhala ali kunja uko; ino si nthawi yoti muzigwiritsa ntchito kupeza mnzanu wotsatira.
Inu kapena mnzanu mumangokhala chete
Anthu ena amangokhala chete ngati njira yothanirana ndi zovuta zomwe sizingachitike. Izi zitha kuwonedwa ngati mtundu wankhanza mbali zonse, koma ndichizindikiro kuti chithandizo chamaukwati chingakhale lingaliro labwino kwambiri. Kupatula apo, maukwati abwinobwino amasangalala ndikulumikizana, ndipo kusalankhula momasuka ndi chisonyezo chakuti zonse sizili bwino m'banjamo. Alison, yemwe pa 45 anali atakwatirana kwa theka la moyo wake, anati, "Tili ngati sitima zomwe zimadutsa usiku. Masiku onse apita pomwe sitimavomerezana, osatinso zokambirana zenizeni. Nthawi zina ndimayesa kuyambitsa zokambirana ndipo amangopereka mayankho a monosyllabic. Ndayamba kuganiza zongotaya thaulo. ” Kulankhulana kwa awiri ndi mzati wa ubale wabwino. Ngati inu, monga Alison, mwakhala chete, ino ndiyo nthawi yoti muwonane ndi omwe akuyendetsa banja.
Mukufuna kuphunzira njira zenizeni zopezera 'ol marital mojo
Katswiri wothandiza maukwati atha kukuthandizani inu ndi mnzanu kuzindikira mawonekedwe anu abwino; zomwe zidakukopani nonse koyambirira. Amatha kukuthandizani ndi njira zenizeni zakuthandizira ndikukwaniritsa ukwati wanu. Wothandizira bwino maukwati adzakhala ndi thumba lonse la maluso omwe akuphunzitseni nonse kuthandiza kukonza ubale wanu ndikuubwezeretsanso. Kusintha kwa moyo ndi ukwati ndizosapeweka koma mfundo za banja lolimba-chikondi, kudalirana, kulankhulana bwino, kulingalira, ndi ulemu- ndiwo maziko a banja lolimba. Katswiri wodziwa bwino maukwati angakuthandizeni kuti mubwererenso ku maziko ofunikira komanso ofunikira.
Ziwerengerozo zili mbali yanu
Mukamakangana zakuwona wothandizira maukwati, ganizirani za ziwerengero zopambana, kupambana kumatanthauzidwa ngati banja losangalala. Ziwerengero, mwatsoka, zili ponseponse bolodi pano. koma koposa pamenepo, ali kumbali yanu. Malo ena ofufuzira amapambana mpaka 80% pomwe ziwerengero zina zimapereka ziwerengero zochepa.
Pomaliza, ngati mumadzizindikira nokha kapena Teresa, Suzy kapena mzimayi wina aliyense pano, muyenera kulingalira mozama kuwona zamankhwala. Muyenera kutaya chiyani? Ukwati wabwino ndichinthu chamtengo wapatali, ndipo mukuyenera kukhala nacho. Ngati wothandizira maukwati angakuthandizeni kutero, muli ndi ngongole kwa inu nokha ndi amuna anu kuti mufufuze.