Zamkati
- Kodi kusudzulana kungachepetse mkangano pakati pa mnzanga ndi ine?
- Kodi ndingadziwe bwanji ngati chisudzulo ndichabwino?
- Kodi mwayi wanga wokwatiranso ndi uti?
- Kodi moyo umakhala bwino banja litatha?
Palibe ukwati wangwiro. Popeza kuti aliyense ndi wosiyana, sikwanzeru kuyembekezera kuti anthu awiri amene alowa m'banja sangatsutsane kapena kukangana.
Ngakhale iwo omwe anali okondana kwambiri ndipo anali ndiubwenzi wabwino atakwatirana amatha kukumana ndi mavuto panjira. Ngati banja lanu layamba kukumana ndi mavuto, mwina mumadabwa kuti kodi chisudzulo ndi yankho lolondola liti.
Kaya mavuto pakati panu ndi mnzanu adachitika chifukwa cha mavuto azachuma, malingaliro osiyana amomwe angalerere ana anu, kusakhulupirika, kapena kungopatukana, muyenera kuganizira zomwe mungasankhe mosamala kuti muwone ngati mungakhale osangalala banja litatha kapena ayi .
Mutha kukhala osasangalala muukwati wanu, koma kodi mungakhale osangalala mutasudzulana, kapena zingakhale bwino kuchita zonse zomwe mungathe kuti mukonze ubale wanu ndikupewa kuyambiranso?
Zikatero, mungasankhe bwanji kusudzulana? Mukudziwa bwanji kuti chisudzulo ndichabwino?
Mkhalidwe uliwonse ndi wosiyana, chifukwa chake palibe yankho lolondola ngati mungasudzule kapena ayi.
Komabe, poyang'ana mavuto omwe mukukumana nawo, kumvetsetsa zomwe mungachite, ndikuwona zabwino ndi zovuta zakukwatira kapena kusudzulana, mutha kupanga chisankho chabwino kwa inu ndi banja lanu.
Pomwe mungasankhe kusudzulana, zitha kukhala zabwino kufunsa kwa ena, kuphatikiza abwenzi kapena abale omwe malingaliro awo mumawalemekeza, othandizira kapena alangizi apabanja.
Kodi kusudzulana kungachepetse mkangano pakati pa mnzanga ndi ine?
Ngati mukukumana ndi mavuto am'banja, chimodzi mwazinthu zomwe zimakudetsani nkhawa kwambiri ndi kuchuluka kwa mikangano m'banja mwanu. Kukhala mumkhalidwe wotere kumakhala kopanikiza kwambiri.
Ngati muli ndi ana, mutha kukhala ndi nkhawa ngati kuwonetsedwa pazokangana kapena mikangano kungasokoneze kukula kwawo komanso moyo wabwino. Kusudzulana kumawoneka ngati njira yothetsera mkangano ndikupatsani mwayi wokhala banja lamtendere.
Ngakhale kuthetsa banja lanu kumawoneka ngati njira yopita kunyumba yopanikizika, muyenera kudziwa kuti zinthu zimaipiraipira zisanakhale bwino.
Ngati mukukumana kale ndi mikangano mbanja mwanu, kuwuza mnzanuyo kuti mukufuna kusudzulana kungapangitse kuti zinthu zifike poipa kapena kupitilira apo, pamene mukugawa moyo wanu wina ndi mnzake.
Ngakhale inu ndi mnzanu mutagwirizana kuti muthe kusudzulana, mutha kukumana ndi mikangano mukamakambirana zamalamulo, zachuma, komanso momwe mungamasiyane.
Mikangano yokhudza kugawa katundu wanu, momwe mungasamalire ndalama, kapena kusamalira ana anu zitha kukhala zovuta kuthetsa, ndipo milandu yamilandu iyi imatha kukhala yovuta kwambiri kuposa mikangano kapena kusamvana komwe mudakhala nako muukwati wanu.
Mwamwayi, pogwira ntchito ndi loya wosudzula banja, mutha kudziwa njira zabwino zothetsera mavutowa. Ntchito yothetsa banja ikatha, mutha kupita ku moyo womwe mwachiyembekezo ungakhale moyo wamtendere komanso wopanda mikangano.
Ndikofunikanso kudziwa kuti kumaliza kwa chisudzulo chanu sikukutanthauza kuthetsa mkangano ndi mnzanu. Pankhaniyi, chisangalalo pambuyo pa chisudzulo sichitsimikizika.
Ngakhale maanja ena amatha "kupuma koyera" ndikukhala kunja kwa wina ndi mnzake kupita mtsogolo, maanja ambiri osudzulana akupitilizabe kulumikizana palimodzi kudzera pakulipira kwa okwatirana, kapena makolo angafunikire kupitiliza ubale chifukwa amagawana ana awo.
Ngati inu ndi mnzanu mukhala moyo wina ndi mnzake mutasudzulana, mutha kupitilizabe kukumana ndi mikangano. Ngati muli ndi ana limodzi, mikangano yatsopano imatha kubuka yokhudza momwe ana anu adzaleredwere, kapena mikangano yakale ingabwererenso mukamayankhulana.
Kungakhale kophweka kubwerera munjira zakale ndikuyambiranso zotsutsana zakale. Komabe, mwakhazikitsa malire omveka bwino komanso kuganizira zofuna za ana anu, mutha kuyesetsa kuchepetsa mikangano, kukhala ndi ubale wabwino, ndikukhala osangalala banja litatha.
Kodi ndingadziwe bwanji ngati chisudzulo ndichabwino?
Kuthetsa banja lanu ndi gawo lalikulu, ndipo ambiri a inu mungakhale mukuganiza, kodi ndidzakhala wosangalala kuposa banja?
Ngakhale pali zochitika zina, monga zakusakhulupirika kapena kuchitira nkhanza, pomwe munthu akhoza kukhala wotsimikiza kuti adzakhala osangalala atasudzulana, nthawi zambiri, okwatirana sadziwa ngati angafune kusiya ukwati wawo.
Mukamaganiza zosudzulana, mungafunike kupenda momwe zinthu zilili ndikuwona ngati kuthetsa banja lanu kungakupatseni mwayi. Kodi ndizotheka kusunga ubale wanu?
Mungafune kukambirana za kuthekera kwa upangiri waukwati ndi mnzanuyo kuti muone ngati nonse awiri mungagwirire limodzi kuthetsa mikangano yanu ndikuonetsetsa kuti nonse mungakhale achimwemwe.
Muthanso kuyang'ana njira zina zomwe mungakulitsire chisangalalo chanu ndikukhutira m'moyo wanu, monga kuchita zokonda zanu zokha kapena ndi mnzanu kapena kucheza ndi anzanu kapena abale anu.
Mwa kupeza njira zothetsera ndi kuthana ndi mavuto omwe akukumana ndi mavuto m'moyo wanu, mutha kupeza kuti mutha kukhala ndi banja losangalala ndikupewa kusatsimikizika ndi zovuta zomwe zimadza chifukwa cha chisudzulo.
Komanso Penyani:
Koma, ngati mukuwona kuti simungathe kuthetsa mavuto anu apabanja, kusudzulana kungakupatseni njira yopita ku moyo wabwino.
Simuyenera kukhalabe muukwati wosakwaniritsa kapena nyumba yosasangalala komanso yodzaza mavuto yopanda mwayi wowongolera. Ngakhale kusudzulana kumatha kukhala kopanikiza, kumatha kukupatsani mwayi kuti mutuluke munyengo yoipa ndikukhala osangalala banja litatha.
Kodi mwayi wanga wokwatiranso ndi uti?
Nthawi zambiri, anthu amasankha kukhalabe muukwati womwe sukugwira ntchito chifukwa choopa kukhala okha.
Muyenera kuti mudalowa m'banja lanu, mukuyembekeza kuti lidzakhala moyo wanu wonse, ndipo mukakhazikitsa ubale wanthawi yayitali, kusiya ndi kuyambiranso kumakhala chiyembekezo.
Mutha kuda nkhawa kuti simudzapezanso chikondi, koma mwamwayi, izi siziyenera kukhala choncho, ndipo mwambiwo umati, "M'nyanja muli nsomba zambiri."
Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti pafupifupi theka la anthu omwe asudzulana adzakwatiranso pasanathe zaka zisanu, ndipo pafupifupi 75% ya anthu amakwatiranso zaka khumi. Ziwerengerozi zikuwonetsa kuti, zowonadi, mutha kukhala osangalala banja litatha.
Nthawi zina, kuyamba chibwenzi chatsopano kumawoneka kovuta, makamaka kwa iwo omwe ali ndi ana. Komabe, anthu ena ambiri ali mumikhalidwe yofananayo, ndipo kupeza munthu woyenera nthawi zambiri kumangokhala kulimbikira.
Zomwe mwaphunzira muukwati wanu zitha kukuthandizani kuti mukhale ndi ubale wabwino wopitilira muyeso, kusiya zolakwa zanu zakale, ndikukhalabe osangalala mutasudzulana!
Kodi moyo umakhala bwino banja litatha?
Kusankha kothetsa banja sikungakhale chitsimikizo cha chisangalalo. Komabe, ili ndi gawo loyenera kupita patsogolo kuchokera ku banja lomwe silikuyenda ndikukhazikitsa moyo wabwino kwa inu ndi banja lanu.
Komabe, muyenera kudziwa kuti chisudzulo chimadza ndi zovuta zambiri, ndipo zimatha kutenga nthawi kuti mufike poti mungakhale osangalala mutasudzulana.
Mukasudzulana, muyenera kuthana ndi mavuto osiyanasiyana. Mungafunike kukhazikitsa njira zatsopano zokhaliramo nyumba, pangani ndandanda ya nthawi yomwe mudzakhale ndi ana anu, ndikupanga bajeti yatsopano yomwe ingakuthandizeni kuti muzitha kukhala moyo wabwino.
Pogwira ntchito ndi loya wa chisudzulo, mutha kukhala otsimikiza kuti mukuyendetsa bwino njira zothetsera banja, ndipo mutha kuchitapo kanthu kuti muyambe gawo lotsatira la moyo wanu ndi phazi lamanja.
Dziwani kuti pokhapokha ngati ili nkhani yonga nkhanza zomwe palibe njira ina kupatula kusankha kusudzulana, yesani upangiri wabanja kapena pitani kukalandira upangiri waukwati. Aphungu aukwati kapena pankhaniyi akatswiri azamisala atha kukumba mozama pazomwe zimayambitsa mavutowo kapena kukuthandizani kuthana ndi mavuto atsiku ndi tsiku omwe akukhudza chibwenzi. Mwanjira imeneyi mutha kukhala otsimikiza kuti nonse awiri kapena m'modzi mwa inu mwayesapo chilichonse musanatuluke.