Zamkati
- 1. Kumvetsera, koma osamvera
- 2. Kuyang'ana pa zomwe muyenera kutsitsa
- 3. Kuyankhula osadzifufuza kaye iwe
- 4. Osayang'ana kamvekedwe ka mawu anu
- 5. Kusalankhulana
- 6. Kuimba mlandu
- 7. Kunyoza mnzanu
- 8. Kupanga zoganiza
- 9.Kuwonetsa za kusowa chitetezo kwanu
- 10. Osati kufotokoza nokha kwa mnzanu
- 11. Kukhala ndi ziyembekezo zosatheka
- 12. Kuyankhula limodzi koma osayankhula
Maukwati ena abwino mwina amatha chifukwa cha kulumikizana pakati pa anthu okwatirana.
Mabanja ena amakondana kwambiri ndipo amadzipereka kwa wina ndi mnzake koma samawoneka ngati akumvana chifukwa kulumikizana kwawo ndi kovuta.
Kuphatikiza apo, alangizi a mabanja nthawi zambiri amatchula kusowa kwa kulumikizana kapena kulumikizana m'banja kuti ndiomwe amawononga kwambiri ukwati.
Chifukwa chake, kumvetsetsa zovuta zomwe mungakumane nazo m'banja mwanu ndikuyesetsa kuzikonza ndibwino kuyesetsa, simukuganiza?
Koma, mungakonze bwanji kusayankhulana muubwenzi?
Nkhaniyi imagawana zolakwika khumi ndi ziwiri zolumikizana kapena zolumikizana pamaubwenzi komanso zomwe zingachitike kuti zithetse.
1. Kumvetsera, koma osamvera
Chimodzi mwazinthu zazikulu zolephera kulumikizana zomwe timakumana nazo ndikumatha kwathu kwakumvetsera, koma osamvera.
Ndikadakhala kuti tonsefe tidazindikira kuti ichi ndi chomwe chimayambitsa mavuto m'mabanja ndipo tonse titha kukhala olakwa. Khalani ndi nthawi yophunzira kukulitsa luso lanu lomvetsera kuti mubweretse mtendere muukwati wanu!
2. Kuyang'ana pa zomwe muyenera kutsitsa
Anthu ambiri omwe ali pachibwenzi amatha kukumbukira nthawi yomwe amangotsitsa kwa anzawo popanda chidwi chofuna kumva zomwe zikuchitika ndi akazi awo.
Tonsefe tikudziwa kuti zonse zomwe timapereka komanso zomwe timapereka sizabwino, ndipo mwina tonsefe takhala tikulakwa nazo nthawi zina. Pewani kulephera kulankhulana mwa kudzifufuza nokha nthawi zonse.
3. Kuyankhula osadzifufuza kaye iwe
O, uku ndikulephera kulumikizana kumodzi komwe tonsefe titha kupitako nthawi ndi nthawi.
Khalani ndi chizolowezi chofufuza ndi kulingalira musanayambe kulira ndi kukuwa m'mabwenzi, ndipo mupulumutsa banja lanu pamavuto ndi mikangano!
4. Osayang'ana kamvekedwe ka mawu anu
Dr. John Gottman akunena kuti adapeza mu kafukufuku wake kuti momwe mumayambira zokambirana ndimomwe mumamaliza zokambirana.
Chifukwa chake kuwunika kamvekedwe ka mawu anu kuti muwonetsetse kuti sizingayambitse zinthu pakulakwitsa ndi chinthu chomwe tonsefe titha kuyamba kuchita.
Mwanjira imeneyi, tidzapewa kulumikizana kumeneku mtsogolo.
5. Kusalankhulana
Musalole kuti kulumikizana kwanu kopanda mawu kukhale zolephera zomwe zimasokoneza banja lanu. Maonekedwe a nkhope yanu ndi manja anu komanso mawonekedwe amaso onse adzalembetsedwa kuti achite zabwino kapena zoyipa.
6. Kuimba mlandu
Cholakwika ndi kulephera kulankhulana pafupipafupi komwe kumachitika mbanja.
Mawu oti kudziwa bwino kumabweretsa kunyoza ndikoyenera pano. Yesetsani kukumbukira izi ndikuwonetsa kukoma mtima, kuyamika, ndi kuvomereza mnzanuyo musanayambe kusewera.
7. Kunyoza mnzanu
Kulephera kulumikizana kumeneku ndikotsimikizika kuti palibe; sibwino kunyoza mnzanu. M'malo mwake, yang'anani pakulimbikitsana wina ndi mzake ndikusilira mikhalidwe yawo yabwino m'malo mongoyang'ana pamakhalidwe awo oyipa.
8. Kupanga zoganiza
Kupanga malingaliro ndi vuto lolumikizana lomwe ambiri aife tili nalo; nthawi zambiri timaganiza kuti winawake ndi njira inayake, kapena azichita kapena kutero.
Zomwe zikutanthauza kuti tikamalumikizana, zilibe kanthu kuti mnzanu sakuyankha momwe mukuyembekezera kuti akuyankhirani mungaganizire kuti apita, kapena akuganiza.
Zomwe zingayambitse kusakhazikika komanso kusatsimikizika kumbali yanu ndikukhumudwitsa mnzanu?
9.Kuwonetsa za kusowa chitetezo kwanu
Nthawi zambiri timaganiza kuti aliyense amaganiza chimodzimodzi momwe ife timaganizira, koma nthawi zambiri samaganiza. Chitsanzo chachikale cha munthu amene amafotokoza za kusatetezeka kwawo muukwati ndi pamene mnzake amakhala chete modabwitsa (nthawi zambiri amuna).
Wokondedwa wawo angayambe kuganiza kuti china chake chalakwika, makamaka m'banja kapena momwe mnzake amawonera.
Pachitsanzo ichi, izi zimachitika chifukwa yemwe akumuganizira wina angaope kuti tsiku lina banja lawo lingadzatengeke ndi mavuto, kapena mnzake adzawapeza osakongola akamakalamba. Izi zitha kubweretsa mikangano, chisokonezo, kusowa chitetezo, komanso kudzudzulidwa mosafunikira.
10. Osati kufotokoza nokha kwa mnzanu
Anthu ena zimawavuta kudziwonetsa okha.
Zimakhala zovuta kuti afotokozere momwe akumvera, zomwe zimatha kubweretsa kukhumudwa kapena kusamvetsetsa. Kulephera kulumikizana kwachikale ndikosavuta kuthana; mumangofunika kutsegula pang'ono kwa mnzanu ndikulola kuti 'akuwoneni.'
11. Kukhala ndi ziyembekezo zosatheka
Sosaite imatiphunzitsa kuti pali njira yeniyeni yomwe ukwati woyenera kapena moyo wake uyenera kukhalira, koma tonsefe sitingakwanitse kulowa m'mabokosi ang'onoang'ono amtunduwu.
Chifukwa chake ngati mwakhala mukuyembekezera kuti banja lanu liziwonongeka momwe akuwonetsera muma magazine owala, kenako ndikukwiyirani ndi wokondedwa wanu chifukwa chakusiyitsani, ndiye kuti mwangogwera pakuyembekezera zosatheka.
Zinthu zosayembekezereka ndizomwe zimayambitsa kulumikizana nthawi zonse.
Kumbukirani kuwona zomwe mkazi kapena mkazi wanu akuyembekeza kuchokera mbanja, ubale, moyo, ndipo mudzilola kukambirana ndikupanga zoyembekeza zomwe zingachitike limodzi.
Onaninso: Zoyembekezereka Zothandizana Nawo- Zomwe 'mumafunikira' ndi zomwe 'mukufuna'.
12. Kuyankhula limodzi koma osayankhula
Chifukwa chake mumacheza pafupipafupi za chilichonse chofunikira kwambiri, koma palibe amene akuyankhula ndi njovu m'chipindacho, kapena palibe amene akufotokoza zosowa zawo, maloto awo, zokhumba zawo, malingaliro awo, ndi ziyembekezo zawo.
Zomwe zikutanthauza kuti chilichonse chomwe mumalumikizana ndichachiphamaso.
Kuyankhulana kumeneku kudzakupatsani mwayi wothamangirana ngati mungalolere kutero, ndipo zonse zomwe muyenera kuchita ndikutseguka ndikukhulupirirana.