Zamkati
- Kutanthauza kunyoza potengera maubale
- Zitsanzo zamanyazi muubwenzi
- Zotsatira zonyoza
- Kodi ndizotheka kuti chibwenzi chibwezeretse pamakhalidwe onyansa?
- Njira 10 zapamwamba zothetsera kunyoza m'mabwenzi achikondi
- 1. Kumvetsetsa mbali yanu yakuda
- 2. Kulankhulana kwachindunji m'malo mwa kunyoza
- 3. Sinthani malingaliro anu poyang'ana zabwino
- 4. Onaninso zakale
- 5. Kukulitsa chikhalidwe chakuyamikira
- 6. Madandaulo, koma osadzudzula
- 7. Chisoni ndichofunikira
- 8. Dziwani zomwe zimayambitsa kunyansidwa
- 9. Kumvetsera ndikofunika
- 10. Kuganizira zoyembekezera zanu
- Mapeto
Lingaliro lakunyoza, makamaka m'mabwenzi achikondi, ndizovuta kuzindikira ndikuwongolera. Ndizosatsutsika kuti palibe ubale wabwino. Ubale uliwonse ndi banja zimasemphana, ndipo kunyozana nthawi zambiri kumawonekera munjira zobisika.
Komabe, kufalikira pamikangano iyi ndikuti pali zifukwa kapena zifukwa zodziwika. Zikafika pakunyoza anzanu ena, zinthu zimatha kukhala zovuta.
Ngati mukufuna kudziwa zambiri zakunyozedwa m'mabanja komanso maubale ndi momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi, werengani!
Kafukufuku wochitidwa ndi Dr. Gottman adanenanso kuti kunyozedwa ndi chimodzi mwazinthu zazikulu zomwe zimayambitsa chisudzulo ndi kulekana.
Chifukwa chake, zikuwonekeratu kuti malingaliro a kunyoza komanso kuchitira mwano zina zofunika kuzindikirika ndikuwathandizirako koyambirira.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Njira 8 Mabanja Angathetsere Ubwenzi Wawo Atakangana
Kutanthauza kunyoza potengera maubale
Kotero, kodi kunyoza ndi chiani pachibwenzi? Njira yosavuta yofotokozera kunyoza maubale ndi pamene mumalankhula ndi anzanu ena m'njira yomwe imawaseka.
Mnzake akamanyoza komanso kunyoza mnzakeyo, ndimanyazi. Komabe, kusekako kumachitika mosabisa, mosalunjika, mwamwano-mwaukali.
Mkhalidwe wosazindikira wonyoza ndi womwe umapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kuzizindikira ndikukumana nazo. Mwachidule, ndizosiyana kukhala ulemu kwa mnzanu.
Zitsanzo zamanyazi muubwenzi
Kuti mumvetsetse momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi, muyenera kudziwa zitsanzo zodziwika bwino komanso zizindikilo zakunyoza.
Kodi kunyoza kumawoneka bwanji? Kuyankhulana kwachipongwe ndikosakanikirana kwa mawu komanso osalankhula. Zizindikiro zina ndi izi:
- Zoseketsa
- Kuyitanira mayina onyoza ngati wonyezimira, wotayika, chinsomba chonenepa, ndi zina zambiri.
- Kukokomeza
- Maonekedwe akumaso monga kunyoza, kukweza milomo yakumtunda, kugubuduza maso, ndi zina zambiri.
- Kunyoza wina ndi mnzake
Kuti mudziwe momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi, choyamba, onani zina mwa zitsanzo za kunyozedwa potengera maubwenzi:
- “Ndiwe nkhumba yonona, yodzikonda! Zomwe mumachita ndikuphika nokha ndikudya! Zidakhala bwanji ndikuphikira ine, ha ?! ”
- “Ndiwe wamisala? Ndani amayendetsa ngati munthu wopenga, ha ?! Kodi wasokonezeka mutu? ”
- “Ukudziwa chifukwa chake umachedwa nthawi zonse? Chifukwa ndiwe wosaganizira! ”
Tsopano popeza mukudziwa za zisonyezo ndi zitsanzo za kunyozedwa muubwenzi tiyeni tiwone zina mwazovuta zakunyozedwa musanaphunzire kukonza mnyozo pachibwenzi.
Nazi zitsanzo zina ndi zizindikilo zakunyoza maubwenzi omwe mungawone:
Zotsatira zonyoza
Mukamanyoza anzanu ena ndikuchitapo kanthu, pakhoza kukhala zovuta zina. Ndipo nchifukwa ninji izi zimachitika? Ndi chifukwa chakuti pali kusiyana kwakukulu pakati podzudzula kopindulitsa komanso kulumikizana kwachipongwe.
Ngati mumvetsetsa zotsatira zakunyozedwa, kumvetsetsa momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi kumakhala kosavuta.
Kunyoza kuli ndi mphamvu zopangitsa kuti chibwenzi kapena banja likhale lotetezeka kwa wolandirayo. Ubwenzi umayamba kumva ngati bwalo lankhondo. M'malo mozindikira kuti ubalewo ndi pothawirapo, umayamba kukhala wowopsa kwa wolandirayo.
Chifukwa chiyani izi zimachitika? Ndi chifukwa chakuti kunyozeka muubwenzi kumatha kupangitsa kuti ena anu azidziona kuti ndi otsika komanso osayenera. Kunyoza kuli ndi mphamvu yakupweteketsa kwambiri malingaliro a wolandirayo.
Ngati mukuwona ngati wokondedwa wanu akukunyozani, kungakhale kusuntha kumapeto kwa mnzanu. Kufunika kwa kuwongolera, mphamvu, komanso kutsogola ndizomwe zitha kuchititsa kunyozedwa.
Tsoka ilo, ngati mungalole kuti izi zipitilire, zitha kukhudza kwambiri kulumikizana pakati panu.
Chibwenzi chanu chimatha kumangokhala ngati danga pomwe mumayenera kudziteteza ndi kudziteteza. Zingamveke ngati mukuyesetsa kuti mupewe kutsutsidwa ndikuyenda pamazira a ma mayiyo nthawi zonse.
Lingaliro lokumana ndi mnzanu kumapeto kwa tsiku sikuwoneka ngati losangalatsa kwa inu chifukwa mumakhala otetezeka nthawi zonse.
Kodi ndizotheka kuti chibwenzi chibwezeretse pamakhalidwe onyansa?
Ngakhale kunyozana kuli ndi mphamvu yolakwika m'mabanja ndi maubwenzi achikondi, pali zambiri kuti athe kuzindikira mikhalidwe iyi ndikukonzekera.
Malingana ngati mukudziwa za zizindikiro zakunyoza muubwenzi, muli ndi mphamvu zogwirira ntchito ndi mnzanu kukonza vutoli. Kulola zinthu kutuluka mmanja, mwatsoka, kusokoneza ubale wanu.
Izi zimachitika chifukwa ngati mumalandira zinthu zamanyazi komanso zikhalidwe zina, mutha kusiya kudzidalira.
Chifukwa chake, tsopano popeza mukudziwa zonse zokhudza tanthauzo, zizindikiro, zitsanzo, ndi zotsatira zakunyozedwa, tiyeni tiwone momwe tingalekere kunyozedwa komanso momwe tingakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi.
Njira 10 zapamwamba zothetsera kunyoza m'mabwenzi achikondi
Kunyozana kumatha kuwononga ubale. Nazi njira zothandiza kwambiri za momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi:
1. Kumvetsetsa mbali yanu yakuda
Imodzi mwa njira zothanirana ndi kunyozedwa mu chibwenzi ndikudziyang'ana pawokha. Yang'anani mkati mwamakhalidwe anu ngati mukukunyozani. Pamafunika kulimba mtima kuti mudziyang'anire nokha ndikumvetsetsa momwe mumakhalira.
Anthu ena amakonda kuchita zachipongwe, monga anthu omwe ena amati "onyoza." Mitundu ina ya anthu ndi omwe amakhala onyada, omwe amagwiritsa ntchito mawu oseketsa, ndipo amangokhala amwano.
2. Kulankhulana kwachindunji m'malo mwa kunyoza
Monga tanena kale, ngati mukunyoza wokondedwa wanu, mukugwiritsa ntchito mawu oseketsa ndi kunyoza mwanjira ina kuti mumunyoze mnzanuyo. Chifukwa chake, si njira yolumikizirana mwachindunji.
Pankhani yophunzira momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi, kuyankhulana ndi mnzanu ndikofunikira.
Ubwenzi wathanzi uliwonse umamangidwa pamaziko olankhulana momasuka komanso momasuka. Chifukwa chake, ndibwino kufotokoza kutsutsa kwanu molunjika m'malo mosokoneza mnzanu.
3. Sinthani malingaliro anu poyang'ana zabwino
Tsopano, malingaliro awa ndiosavuta kunena kuposa kuchita. Mfundoyi ikunena kuti muyenera kuthana ndi malingaliro anu olakwika ndikuwachotsa ndi malingaliro okondana ndi mnzanu.
Kukhala ndi chiyembekezo chokwanira kungakuthandizeni kuyesetsa kusintha momwe mumamvera, ndikupulumutsanso ubale wanu ndi mzanu. Chimodzi mwazomwe zimayambitsa kunyozedwa ndi malingaliro osayenera kwa wokondedwa wanu.
Chifukwa chake, kudzera mu chithandizo, mutha kuyesa kukonza momwe mukumvera, ndikusintha momwe mumawonera, kuti mumuwone mnzanuyo moyenerera.
4. Onaninso zakale
Iyi ndi imodzi mwanjira zosavuta kumvetsetsa momwe mungakonzere kunyoza muubwenzi. Yendani pamayendedwe okumbukira ndikuwonetsetsa pazokumbukira zabwino zonse zomwe mudagawana ndi mnzanu.
Kungakhale koyamba kukumana ndi mnzanu, kukambirana koseketsa komwe mudakhala nako, usiku wapadera wachikondi ndi chibwenzi ndi wokondedwa wanu, nthawi yanu yachisangalalo, tsiku losangalatsa usiku, ndi zina zambiri.
5. Kukulitsa chikhalidwe chakuyamikira
Mfundoyi ikukamba za ntchito yomwe muyenera kuyikapo kuti muchiritse kunyoza m'mabanja nthawi zonse. Kuthetsa kukhumudwa si chinthu chomwe chingachitike mwadzidzidzi.
Kukhala ndi malingaliro abwino ndi malingaliro sikokwanira. Iyenera kuwonjezeredwa pakupanga miyambo ndi wokondedwa wanu momwe mumayamikirira kulumikizana komwe mumagawana ndi okondedwa anu ndikukondwerera abale anu.
Izi zitha kutenga njira zosiyanasiyana, monga kukonzekera masiku a sabata sabata iliyonse, kusamba limodzi, kutenga tsiku limodzi pamwezi kuti mupite ku spa, kuwonera makanema limodzi, kugona madzulo aliwonse mukatha kugwira ntchito, kukonzekera tchuthi limodzi, ndi zina zambiri .
Zizolowezi zabwinozi zimatha kukutsegulirani munthu wabwino yemwe ndi wokondedwa wanu komanso chifukwa chomwe mudasankhira kukhala naye. Ikuwonetsani kukongola kwodzipereka.
6. Madandaulo, koma osadzudzula
Momwe munganene zomwe mukufuna kunena zimakhudza kwambiri momwe mnzanu amalandirira ndikuchita zomwezo. Zimakhudzanso momwe mnzanu akumvera akamamvera.
Chifukwa chake, m'malo mongodzudzula mwanjira ina, kupeza njira yabwino yoperekera madandaulo kwa mnzanu ndikofunikira pankhani yophunzira kunyoza chibwenzi.
7. Chisoni ndichofunikira
Zitha kuchitika kuti nthawi zambiri, mumadzudzula wokondedwa wanu osamvetsetsa chifukwa chomwe mnzanu wapangira zomwe adachitazo.
Chifukwa chake, ndikofunikira kuti muzitha kudziyika nokha muzochita za mnzanuyo ndikuganiza momwe mukadapangira komanso zomwe mukadachita. Kumeneko kumatchedwa kumvera ena chisoni.
8. Dziwani zomwe zimayambitsa kunyansidwa
Malingaliro onyansa ndi machitidwe samangowonekera pompopompo. Pali zifukwa zambiri zokhalira oterewa. Muyenera kufufuza ndikudziyang'ana nokha.
Pezani zifukwa zomwe mumamvera ndikuchita momwe mumachitira. Kodi ndichifukwa choti muli ndi chosowa chosakwaniritsidwa cha mphamvu, kapena mukukumana ndi ulemu? Kodi mukukhumudwitsidwa? Dziwani zomwe zimayambitsa.
9. Kumvetsera ndikofunika
Kudzudzula osamupatsa mnzako mpata wolankhula kungakhale kowopsa pachibwenzi chanu. Gawo lalikulu lolumikizirana limaphatikizapo kumvetsera kwa mnzanu. Ngati mukufuna kumvedwa, muyenera kumveranso mnzanuyo.
10. Kuganizira zoyembekezera zanu
Iyi ndiye mfundo ina yomwe imafuna kuti mufufuze. Ngati mukuwona kuti mukukhumudwitsidwa kapena kunyozedwa, kodi ndichifukwa choti mumayembekezera zabwino kwambiri kapena zosayembekezereka kuchokera pachibwenzi chanu?
Ngati mukufuna kusunga ubale wanu ndikumukonda mnzanuyo, muyenera kukwaniritsa zomwe mukuyembekezera kuchokera kuzofunika zanu komanso ubalewo.
Mapeto
Ngati mukumverera kuti mumanyoza mnzanu kapena ndinu amene mumachita zachipongwe, werengani nkhaniyi. Pumirani kwambiri. Pali yankho la izi.