Zamkati
Ngakhale samanena, achinyamata amakhala akufunsa mafunso awiri nthawi zonse. “Kodi ndimakondedwa?” ndi "Kodi ndingakwanitse kupeza njira yanga?" Nthawi zambiri makolo amakopeka kuti agwiritse ntchito mphamvu zawo zambiri poyankha funso lachiwiri ndikunyalanyaza loyamba. Ndi kwachibadwa kuti achinyamata ayese kapena kunyalanyaza malire a makolo awo. Malire akamayesedwa, zimakhala zovuta kukumbukira izi who inu monga kholo ndilofunika kwambiri kuposa chani mumachita ngati kholo. Mwanjira ina, ndikofunikira kuti tisaphatikize kudzidalira kwathu momwe timamvera potilera. Tikatero, ndiye kuti sitingayankhe nthawi zonse yankho lofunikira pafunso loyamba.
Achinyamata ambiri amakhala ndi zovuta zazikulu zitatu. Loyamba ndi loti “Kodi ndili bwino ndi mawonekedwe anga?” Izi ndizokhudzana ndi kudzidalira kwawo. Lachiwiri ndi loti “Kodi ndili ndi nzeru zokwanira kapena ndingachite bwino pamoyo wanga?” Izi zikugwirizana mwachindunji ndi malingaliro awo oyenerera. Lachitatu ndi loti "Kodi ndimakwanira ndipo anzanga amakonda ngati ine?" Izi zimakhudzana mwachindunji ndikudzimva kuti ndiwe wokondedwa. Izi ndizofunikira zitatu zoyambirira za achinyamata.
Makolo angasokonezedwe pothandiza achinyamata awo kuyankha mafunso awa poyang'ana kwambiri machitidwe awo. Ndidauza makolo ambiri pazaka zapitazi kuti zaka 10 kuchokera pano sizikhala ndi vuto ndi mbale zonyansa zingati zomwe zidatsala mu sinki kapena ntchito zina sizinasiyidwe. Chofunika ndichakuti mwana wanu wamkulu adziwa mosakaika kuti amakondedwa mosavomerezeka ndipo muli pachibwenzi. Tiyenera kukumbutsidwa kuti palibe mwayi wolimbikitsidwa ngati sitikhala pachibwenzi.
Ayenera kumvedwa
Pali zosowa zingapo zomwe tonse tili nazo ndipo kuzikwaniritsa sikofunika kwambiri kuposa zaka zathu zaunyamata. Choyamba ndichofunikira kumva. Kumvedwa sikofanana ndi kuvomereza mwana wanu. Monga makolo, nthawi zambiri timawona kufunikira kuwongolera ana athu akamauza anzathu zinthu zomwe timaona ngati zopanda nzeru kapena zopanda pake. Izi zikachitika pafupipafupi, zimatseka kulumikizana. Achinyamata ambiri (makamaka anyamata) amakhala osalankhulana. Ndizovuta kuti tisayese kupeza zambiri mwa iwo. Ndibwino kuti muzingokumbutsa mwana wanu kuti mulipo.
Kufunika kovomereza
Chosowa chachiwiri ndikuvomereza. Izi zikutsimikizira zomwe akuchita. Nthawi zambiri ngati makolo timadikirira kuti atsimikizire mpaka atazindikira china chake, kuti apange kalasi yomwe timaganiza kuti akuyenera kuchita kapena kuchita ndendende zomwe tapempha. Ndikulimbikitsa makolo kuti avomereze pafupifupi. Ngati wachinyamata akuchita bwino mu gawo limodzi la ntchito, ndiye kuti mutsimikizireni izi m'malo modikirira kuchita bwino kwathunthu. Nthawi zambiri, anthu omwe amapereka chitsimikiziro kwa mwana kapena wachinyamata amakhala anthu omwe ali ndi mphamvu zambiri. Timamva nkhani nthawi zonse momwe mphunzitsi, mphunzitsi kapena wina wodziwika adasinthira kwambiri moyo mwa kuvomereza.
Muyenera kudalitsidwa
Chosowa chachitatu ndicho kudalitsidwa. Wachinyamata sayenera kuchita chilichonse. Uku ndikulandila kopanda tanthauzo komwe sikunapezeke kwa "amene inu muli." Uwu ndi uthenga wokhazikika kuti "ziribe kanthu kuti ndiwe ndani, umachita chiyani kapena umawoneka bwanji ndidzakukonda chifukwa ndiwe mwana wanga wamwamuna kapena wamkazi." Uthengawu sungalankhulidwe kwambiri.
Kufunika kwachikondi
Chosowa chachinayi ndichokonda. Kafukufuku wochuluka wasonyeza kuti atakwanitsa zaka zinayi makolo ambiri amangokhudza ana awo pakafunika kutero, monga kuvala ndi kuvula, kulowa mgalimoto, kulanga. Ndikofunika kwambiri pazaka zaunyamata. Zimakhala zovuta kuwonetsa chikondi mchaka chaunyamata makamaka kwa abambo ndi mwana wamkazi. Zitha kuwoneka zosiyana koma kufunikira kwakukondana sikusintha.
Ayenera kusankhidwa
Chofunikira chachisanu ndicho kusankha. Tonsefe timafuna kuti tisankhidwe paubwenzi ndi wina. Ambiri aife timakumbukira nkhawa yakudikirira kuti tiwone momwe tingasankhire kickball panthawi yopumula. Kusankhidwa ndikofunikira makamaka kwa achinyamata. Wachinyamata akafika povuta kwambiri kuti amukonde kapena kusangalala nayo ndi nthawi yofunika kwambiri yomwe amadziwa kuti mukusankha kukhala nawo. Ndikulimbikitsa kholo kuti lizikhala ndi nthawi yocheza ndi ana awo pafupipafupi. Chitsanzo chabwino cha kufunikira kosankhidwa kumachitika mu kanema Forrest Gump. Patsiku loyamba la sukulu Forrest adasankhidwa ndi Jenny kuti azikhala naye m'basi atasiyidwa ndi ena onse. Kuyambira tsiku lomwelo, Forrest adakondana ndi Jenny.
Kukwaniritsa zosowazi kungatithandizire kulumikizana ndi achinyamata athu ndikuwathandiza kukulitsa kudzidalira, kuthekera ndikukhala mamembala.