Zamkati
- Tanthauzo lokhala mchikondi
- Zizindikiro zakukondana
- Kukhala womasuka komanso woona mtima
- Kudalira
- Kudalirana
- Kudzipereka
- Kukhala wokhutira
- Kugawana katundu
- 1. Mverani zomwe akunena
- 2. Onani zochita zawo
- 3. Zomwe sizili mawu
- Kukulitsa chikondi tsiku ndi tsiku
- Kudzipangira nokha ndikofunikira
- Ubale wanu ndi mwayi wabwino wophunzira
- Nenani kuyamikira kwanu
- Mapeto
Chikondi ndichinthu chosazindikirika komanso chachikulu. Ndizovuta kwambiri kuyankha kuti zikutanthauzanji kukhala mchikondi. Pali njira zambiri zomwe anthu monga ojambula, akatswiri amisala, oyimba, komanso olemba, adayeserapo kufotokoza kuti ali mchikondi.
Pali malingaliro angapo okhudza chikondi omwe ayesa kufotokoza lingaliro, kufotokoza zomwe zimayambitsa, mitundu, zotulukapo, ndi zina zambiri. Chiphunzitso cha Robert Sternberg cha Chikondi ndichimodzi mwazodziwika bwino zomwe zimafotokoza mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya chikondi.
Kukhala mchikondi kumatanthauzanji? Kodi muli ndi winawake wapadera m'moyo wanu amene mukuganiza kuti mukukondana naye? Kodi mukusokonezeka ngati mumakonda munthu ameneyo kapena mukukondana naye?
Kodi mukudabwa ngati ndikulakalaka komanso kutengeka komwe kumafanana ndi gawo loyamba la chibwenzi chilichonse? Ngati lina kapena onse a mafunso awa akusefukira m'malingaliro anu pompano, musadandaule! Nkhaniyi ndi yanu. Nkhaniyi ikufotokoza chilichonse chokhudzana ndi chikondi.
Momwe mungadziwire ngati ndi chikondi, zimamveka bwanji ngati mukukondana ndi anzanu ena, momwe mungakulitsire chikondi, momwe mungayankhulirane ndi wokondedwa wanu za kukondana, ndikuwunika ngati mnzanu akumveranso njira, ndi zina zotero?
Pumirani kwambiri ndikupitiliza kuwerenga nkhaniyi, ndipo mwina mwachiyembekezo ingakuthandizeni kumvetsetsa bwino.
Tanthauzo lokhala mchikondi
Kuwonetsedwa kokwanira kwa anthu pazanema, zolemba, zaluso, komanso nyimbo zokhudzana ndi chikondi kumakhudza kwambiri zikhulupiriro zawo zakukondana.
Anthu ambiri amamva ngati zimachitika monga momwe amawonedwera m'makanema - mumamva zozimitsa moto kuchokera kukupsompsona koyamba, mumamva ngati nthawi yayima, mumayang'anizana ndi chipinda chodzaza, ndipo mumangodziwa.
Koma, tiyeni tikhale owona kwa mphindi: ndi momwe ziliri m'moyo weniweni? Kodi ndizodabwitsa komanso zachidule izi? Zikutanthauza chiyani kukhala mu chikondi m'moyo weniweni? Momwe mungalongosolere chikondi?
Mdziko lenileni, kumvetsetsa ngati mukukondana kapena ayi mwina ndizochulukirapo komanso zovuta. Pambuyo poti bwenzi lanu lokondana litatha, kukhala mchikondi ndikumverera kokongola komwe kumachokera pakuphatikizika kwa zinthu ziwiri.
Choyambirira komanso chachikulu, pamene ubale wanu ndi wokondedwa wanu uli wodzaza ndi zochita zomwe zikutanthauza chikondi, ndipo chachiwiri, mukamva kulumikizana kwamphamvu ndi moyo wanu, zogonana, komanso luso lanu, ndipo mumabweretsa izi kwa mnzanu.
Kuti mumvetsetse izi zosamvetsetseka ndipo, mwatsoka, lingaliro lachilengedwe la chikondi, ndibwino kuti mumvetsetse zina mwazisonyezo zakukondana.
Zizindikiro zakukondana
Mukamakondana ndi mnzanu, kuti mudziwe ngati mumakondanadi, yang'anani zizindikiro zotsatirazi za zomwe zimatanthauza kukondana:
Anthu omwe amakondana amatha kuuza anzawo zaufulu zomwe ali nazo. Kumverera kwa kutseguka ndi kusatetezeka ndikutchuka kwambiri.
Kudaliranso ndikofunikira kwambiri. Anthu omwe ali pachibwenzi amakhala owonekera poyera komanso owona mtima ndipo amaganizira zabwino za okondedwa awo.
Pali kudalirana pakati pa anthu okondana komanso okondana. Kudalirana kumatanthauza kuti nonse mumazindikira udindo wa chibwenzi chanu ndipo mumagwirira ntchito limodzi mwanjira yopindulitsa.
Kudzipereka ndichinthu chinanso chodziwika bwino pakumva chikondi. Anthu okwatirana akamakondana, amafuna kuti azikhala limodzi nthawi yayitali ndikuwona tsogolo limodzi.
Mumakhala okhutira pochita ngakhale ntchito zanthawi zonse komanso zosasangalatsa pamoyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku ndi mnzanu.
Mukufuna kuchita zinthu zosiyanasiyana monga kuphika, kupita kumalo osangalatsa, kukagula zinthu, ndi zina zotero, pamodzi ndi zinthu zanu zazing'ono zimakukumbutsani zina zofunika.
Izi ndi zina mwazizindikiro zomveka bwino zomwe zimayankha tanthauzo la kukhala mchikondi.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: 4 Zizindikiro Zodziwikiratu Zoti Mumakondana
Kuti mumvetsetse bwino zizindikilo zina za chikondi chenicheni, yang'anani kanemayu:
Kodi malingaliro onsewa ndi ofanana? Kukambirana ndi wina wanu wofunika
Tsopano popeza mumvetsetsa bwino tanthauzo la kukhala mchikondi, mungafune kudziwa momwe chikondi chikuwonekera kwa mnzanu. Ngati mukudziwa bwino komwe mwayimilira, nkofunikanso kuwona ngati mnzanu akubwezera momwe akumvera.
Ndiye, kodi kukondana kumatanthauza chiyani kwa wokondedwa wanu? Kodi amakondana nanu? Mwinamwake mukufuna kufufuza zizindikiro zina kuti mutsimikizire musananene kuti "Ndimakukondani" kwa iwo.
Nazi njira zina zomwe mungadziwire ngati wokondedwa wanu akumva chimodzimodzi za inu:
1. Mverani zomwe akunena
Iyi ndi imodzi mwanjira zopusitsa kwambiri kuti mudziwe momwe mnzanu akumvera za inu. Muyenera kumvetsera mwachidwi ndikumvera zomwe ena akunena.
Ngati wokondedwa wanu amakonda kukambirana za tsogolo lanu limodzi komwe mukakhale nonse, galimoto yomwe mudzakhale nayo, ana omwe akufuna kuti mukhale nanu, ndi chizindikiro chabwino.
Ngati bwenzi lanu kapena bwenzi lanu amalankhula zamtsogolo nanu mmenemo, mukudziwa kuti amawona kuthekera kwakanthawi pachibwenzi.
Chinthu china chofunikira ndi momwe amalankhulira za inu. Ngati amakonda kulankhula za umunthu wanu, ndi chizindikiro china chachikulu.
2. Onani zochita zawo
Ndizowona kuti zochita za munthu ndizowonetseratu zamakhalidwe ndi zolinga zawo. Munthu amatha kunena zinthu zambiri, koma zomwe amachita ndizofunikira kwambiri.
Chifukwa chake samalani momwe mnzanu amachitira ndi inu. Kodi mnzanuyo ali pambali panu pamene mukusowa thandizo? Kodi amamvetsera mwachidwi mukamacheza nawo, ngakhale mutangokhalira kupusa?
Mukakhala ndi tsiku loipa, kodi amadziwa ndi kuchita zinthu zomwe zimakuthandizani kuti mukhale bwino? Njira yosavuta yofotokozera tanthauzo la kukhala mchikondi ndikuti muwone ngati nonse mumayesetsa kapena mukugwirana ntchito.
3. Zomwe sizili mawu
Mfundoyi imadutsa pamachitidwe ndi zochita zawo. Izi ndizokhudzana ndi zomwe mnzanu samakonda kunena. Zizindikiro zosagwiritsa ntchito mawu zimakhala ndi mawonekedwe amthupi, nkhope, ndi zina zambiri. Ndizokhudza momwe amachitira pakampani yanu.
Gawo lalikulu lakumvetsetsa tanthauzo la kukhala mchikondi ndikukhala zenizeni zenizeni mozungulira mnzanu komanso mosemphanitsa. Ganizirani momwe mnzanu amagwirira ntchito pafupi nanu. Kodi mukuganiza kuti ndiwachilengedwe kapena wabodza?
Kodi mnzanu ndi munthu wosiyana akakhala ndi abwenzi kapena abale ake? Kodi wokondedwa wanu ali wokondwa kukuwonani? Kodi amayang'anitsitsa? Kodi ali bwino koma amakhala tcheru pafupi nanu?
Kodi amakukumbatirani ndi kukupsopsonani mukakumana nonse? Kodi akumva bwino pafupi nanu? Mafunso onsewa ndi ofanana ndikukondana nanu. Kuti muwone ngati akumva chimodzimodzi ndi inu, mafunso awa akuyenera kuyankhidwa.
Kukulitsa chikondi tsiku ndi tsiku
Kukulitsa chikondi nthawi zonse ndikofunikira kwambiri. Komabe, ichi ndichinthu chosavuta kunena kuposa kuchita. Pamene zonse muubwenzi wanu komanso moyo wanu zili bwino, ndizosavuta kukulitsa chikondi.
Komabe, tanthauzo lokhala mchikondi limatanthauza kukulitsa chikondi munthawi zovuta zomwezo. Nazi zina mwa njira zomwe mungakulitsire chikondi nthawi zonse:
Ngati mwazindikira kuti kukhala mchikondi kumatanthauza chiyani, Ndikofunikanso kudziwa kuti kukhala mchikondi kungatulutsenso zoyipa zanu. Nthawi zina, chifukwa mumakonda kwambiri wokondedwa wanu, mutha kumangonena mawu opweteka.
Chifukwa chake, ndibwino kuti muzikhala ndi nthawi yokwanira ndikuganizira momwe mumayanjanirana ndi wokondedwa wanu, makamaka osasangalatsa, ndikupeza njira zowatengera mwachikondi mtsogolo.
Mukawona kuti ubale wanu ndi mwayi woti inu ndi mnzanu muphunzire zinthu za wina ndi mnzake ndikukula kuchokera komweko, chidwi sichimafa. Nonse mukupitiliza kuphunzira kuchokera kwa wina ndi mnzake ndikukula limodzi.
Gawo lalikulu lokondana ndi mnzanu ndikuyenera kudzichepetsa chifukwa cha izi. Ndikofunikira kuti muziyamikira kufunika kwa mnzanuyo komanso kupezeka kwake m'moyo wanu. Zizindikiro zazikulu zachikondi sizomwe zili pano.
Kuti mukulitse chikondi nthawi zonse, ndibwino kuti muziyamikira zinthu wamba koma zofunikira zomwe mnzanu amakuchitirani, ndipo inu mumachitiranso mnzanu. Zitha kukupangirani kapu kapena kutsuka mbale kapena kukuthandizani ntchito zapakhomo, ndi zina zambiri.
Tengani nthawi imeneyo kuti mupatse pang'ono kapena kukumbatirana kapena kunena kuti "Ndimakukondani" kapena "zikomo chifukwa chodabwitsa kwa ine."
Njira zina zabwino zokulitsira chikondi nthawi zonse zitha kukhala kuyankhula zabwino za bwenzi lanu kapena bwenzi lanu ngakhale atakhala kuti palibe. Kupanga ndemanga zoyipa za anzanu kapena abale anu sikungapangitse aliyense kumva bwino.
Mapeto
Kugwira ntchito mwa inu nokha m'malo moyesera kuti mugwire ntchito ndi mnzanu ndi cholozera china chofunikira kukumbukira mukamamvetsetsa ndikukondana ndi mnzanu.
Tsopano popeza mukudziwa tanthauzo la kukhala mchikondi, Mutha kukhala ndi chiyembekezo kuti mumvetsetsa momwe mumamvera za anzanu ena!