Zamkati
Kodi mukugwira ntchito yomwe ikukula kapena kukula chifukwa choti mukuyesetsa? Ganizirani momwe mudakwanitsira kuchita bwino m'mbali iyi yamoyo wanu. Anthu ambiri amene amasankha kukhala pachibwenzi ndikofunikira kuti adzakwatirane anganene kuti ubale ndichimodzi mwazinthu zofunika kwambiri. Tikapanda kuchita mogwirizana ndi zikhulupiliro zathu sitimamva bwino, zomwe nthawi zambiri zimakakamiza maanja kapena anthu kuti akawone wothandizira. Chodabwitsa ndichakuti maanja ambiri ndiopambana m'mbali zina za moyo wawo, koma sanaganizepo zogwiritsa ntchito zosakaniza zomwezi kuti banja lawo likhale bwino.
Chifukwa chiyani timanyalanyaza ubale wathu?
M'miyezi yoyambirira ya 18-24 yaubwenzi simukuyenera kuyesetsa kwambiri. Ubwenzi ndiosavuta chifukwa ubongo wathu wadzaza ndi ma neurochemicals omwe amatipangitsa "kukhumbirana" wina ndi mnzake; Gawo ili laubwenzi limatchedwa gawo lochepa. Mu gawo ili la ubale, kulumikizana, kukhumba, komanso kukhala bwino zitha kukhala zosavuta. Kenako timakhala ndi zibwenzi komanso maukwati omwe amatipangitsa kuti tiziuluka. Pomwe fumbi lonse litakhazikika ndipo ubongo wathu utasunthika ndikubisa mankhwala am'magazi, tonse mwadzidzidzi timayamba kugwira ntchito yolumikizana yomwe sitiyenera kuyesetsa mpaka pano. Ngati banjali lasankha kukhala ndi ana, izi zimawoneka mofulumira kwambiri. Timayamba kusinthana ndi wodziyendetsa pawokha, zomwe zitha kutanthauza kuti timachita zomwe tidakhazikitsa kale zokwatirana. Ma Schemas ndi machitidwe amkati omwe tidapeza kudzera m'mbuyomu omwe amatithandiza kumvetsetsa zomwe china chake chimatanthauza kapena kuyimira: kutanthauza kuti ambiri a ife timayamba kusewera mtundu waukwati womwe tidawona makolo athu ali nawo. Kodi tidaphunzira powonera makolo athu akulankhula kapena kuchitirana zinthu mwanjira inayake? Kodi tidawawona akunyalanyazirana kapena kuchita nawo zinthu zatsopano kuti ayambitsenso kukhumbira kumeneko? Kupatula ukwati omwe makolo athu adatitsanzira, ndi kuti komwe timaphunzira momwe tingakhalire ndi banja lolimba, kusukulu, mkalasi? Nthawi zina timawona ubale patali momwe timafunira kukhala, mwina agogo, ukwati wa bwenzi, okwatirana pa TV, koma nthawi zambiri sitimawona zosakaniza zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zinthu ziziyenda bwino. Kuphatikiza apo, kunyalanyaza, pomwe nthawi zambiri kumanyalanyazidwa muubwenzi chifukwa sikumaganiziridwa kuti ndi kovulaza monga nkhanza, kumatha kubweretsa zilonda zakuya zam'mutu kuposa nkhanza zina. Ngati tikumva kuti tikunyalanyazidwa m'maganizo mwathu kapena zogonana, makamaka ngati makolo athu atinyalanyaza, izi zitha kutumiza mauthenga owononga ngati zosowa zathu zilibe kanthu, kapena tilibe nazo ntchito. Chifukwa choopsa chonyalanyazidwa sichimawoneka, zizindikilozo nthawi zambiri zimakhala zobisika ngati chete kapena kunyalanyaza / kupewa- kosawoneka ndi zoopsa (kapena zokumana nazo zopitilira muyeso) zosakhala ndi ubalewo.
Pezani thandizo nthawi isanathe
Maanja nthawi zambiri amayimitsa chithandizo mpaka atamaliza nzeru zawo, atazirala chifukwa chonyalanyazidwa kapena atangotsala pang'ono kuchita ndi chibwenzicho. Nthawi zambiri sikutanthauza kusowa kwa kuthekera kapena kufuna kuti ubalewo ugwire ntchito, ndiye kuti banjali linalibe zida ndi chidziwitso chogwiritsa ntchito molimbika. Iwo penapake adapeza chiyembekezo chosatheka (mwina pakuwonera maubwenzi abwino kuchokera kutali) kuti ngati angakondane mokwanira zitha kugwira ntchito. M'malo mwake, zili ngati kuti mosazindikira akhala akugwira kuti ubale uwonongeke, pomwe kuyesayesa kumatsanulidwa mwa ana, ntchito, nyumba, kulimbitsa thupi komanso zolinga zathanzi. Komabe tikamaganiza za mafunso ngati awa, "Mukufuna kunena chiyani kwa ana anu, zidzukulu zanu, kapena nokha kumapeto kwa moyo wanu za ubale wofunika kwambiri, wautali kwambiri, womwe mudakhalapo nawo?" Zonse mwadzidzidzi zimawoneka bwino ndipo timakhala achangu kuti tigwire ntchitoyo, kuwopa yankho loti, "uh chabwino ndimayesa, ndinali wotanganidwa, ndinali ndi zambiri zomwe zikuchitika, tinangoyenda pang'ono popanda ine ndikulingalira. ”
Ngati mumalemekeza banja lanu, yesetsani kulithetsa. Ngati simukudziwa komwe mungayambire, pemphani thandizo. Muyenera kudziwa miyezo yanu pachibwenzi, kuyang'anira, ndikukhala ndi chidwi cholimbikitsabe - monga momwe mudakwanitsira kuti muchite bwino pantchito yanu.