Zamkati
- 1. Mowa
- 2. Khalani okhwima mwauzimu, motsutsana ndi malingaliro osakhwima
- 3. Ndiwo chitsanzo choyendera cha kumvera ena chisoni ndi chifundo
- 4. Timasiya kufunika kokonza aliyense
Kodi zikutanthauza chiyani kwa inu kukhala kholo labwino mmoyo? Kodi njira zanji zokhalira bambo wabwino?
Kodi mungatengere chitsanzo cha ndani, chomwe chingapatse munthuyu kukhala "tate wabwino"?
Kodi mudazindikira kuti mtundu wa abambo mdziko lathu watsika kwambiri pazaka 25 zapitazi?
Kwa zaka 30 zapitazi, wolemba, wogulitsa, wogulitsa wamkulu, Life Coach komanso Minister David Essel akhala akuthandiza amuna kukhala abambo ndi amayi abwino kuti ayambe kufunafuna mikhalidwe yomwe amuna ena amakhala nayo omwe anganene kuti adzakhala bambo wamkulu wa ana awo.
Pansipa, David amagawana malingaliro ake pazomwe zimatengera kuti mukhale bambo wabwino mdziko lathu lero, komanso njira zinayi zabwino zokhalira bambo wabwino.
Ndine wonyadira kunena kuti ndinali ndi abambo abwino pamoyo wanga. Amalumikizana ndi mkazi wake komanso ana ake, amatipatsa nthawi, inde anali wokhwimitsa koma osapondereza ndipo chidwi chake chinali choti ana ake akule ndi chikhalidwe ndi machitidwe.
Lero, ndizivutika kupeza abambo ambiri omwe ali ndi mikhalidwe yabwinoyi, kapena mikhalidwe yabwinoyi.
Kwa zaka 30 zapitazi, ndawonapo kuchepa kwa amuna omwe amadziyesa okha, pokhudzana ndi maluso a abambo awo.
Zikuwoneka ngati, kuti tayamba kudzikonda, osamvera chisoni komanso omvera ena zomwe akazi athu ndi ana athu amatenga nthawi yomweyo.
Ndikudziwa kuti amuna ena samadziona ngati zitsanzo zabwino, amandiwuza kuti sakufuna kukhala chitsanzo kwa ana awo kapena akazi awo omwe mwina ndiomwe amapambana kwambiri m'moyo.
Ngati muli ndi ana, ngati muli ndi chidwi chofuna kusintha dziko lino, mukuyenera kukhulupirira kuti ndinu chitsanzo chofunikira kwambiri chomwe angawone mpaka atachoka kwanu.
Chifukwa chake tiyeni tiwone makiyi 4 ofunikira kwambiri kuti musinthe, kusintha, kapena kufufuta ngati mukufuna kukhala opambana bambo kuthekera kwa ana anu ndi mnzanu.
Njira 4 zokhala bambo wabwino
1. Mowa
Zimasokoneza mwayi wambiri kuti bambo akhale bambo weniweni.
Ngati mumamwa pafupipafupi, kapena mumamwa zakumwa zopitilira 2 mpaka 3 tsiku lililonse, simuli olimba mtima kwa ana anu.
Ngati mumamwa ndikusintha moyo wanu mwanjira iliyonse, zomwe zimachitikira aliyense, mukuwonetsa ana anu kuti mumakonda kwambiri chizolowezi chanu, ndiye kuti muli nawo.
Ndipo sindine wotsutsa mowa, sindidakwa.
Ndipo izi zikutanthauza kuti, ngati mukufuna kukhala ndi tambula ya vinyo ndi chakudya chamadzulo, ma ounike 4, sangalalani koma siyani pamenepo.
Ngati mukufuna kumwa mowa Loweruka masana, sangalalani koma siyani pamenepo.
Mutha kumwa, ndicho chakumwa chimodzi, ndipo mumalumikizanabe ndi ana anu koma koposa zomwe ndingakuuzeni kuchokera pazomwe zinachitikira sizigwira ntchito.
Ndidali ndiudindo mu 1980 woti ndikhale bambo wa mwana wamwamuna wachichepere, ndipo inali nthawi yomwe ndimamwa pafupipafupi. Mukadandifunsa ngati ndine bambo wabwino kwa iye ndikadati "Gahena inde! Ndine womvetsera, wopezeka, ndipo ndimaganizira za tsogolo lake. "
Chowonadi chokha m'mawu anga omaliza chinali chakuti ndimasamala za tsogolo lake. Koma ine kunalibe.
Palibe amene amamwa. Ndipo limenelo ndi phunziro lomwe ndidayenera kuphunzira adakali aang'ono, kuti ana angapo otsatira omwe ndidakwanitsa kulera, adakhala ndi munthu wamtundu wina wosiyana kwambiri ndi omwe ndimayang'anira.
Ndinayenera kukula ndikuyankha funso, momwe ndingakhalire bambo wabwino.
2. Khalani okhwima mwauzimu, motsutsana ndi malingaliro osakhwima
Tsopano izi ndizosangalatsa. Ngati mungafunse abambo lero, pafupifupi abambo onse anganene kuti ndi okhwima mwamaganizidwe. Koma limenelo ndi bodza lalikulu lamafuta.
Mukakhala okhwima m'maganizo, simumangokangana pazama TV, simumalemba ma tweets onyoza pa Twitter, mwanjira ina simutsatira munthu yemwe ali ku White House chifukwa momwe amachitira, abambo ambiri amachita mwanjira imeneyi, amakhala osakhwima kwambiri.
Amatchedwa kukhala wopezerera. Zimatchedwa kukhala wodzikonda. Amatchedwa kukhala wosakhwima kwambiri.
Ngati mozungulira chakudya chamadzulo, kapena mgalimoto, sindikusamala ngati mukuyankhula ndi mkazi wanu kapena mnzanu wapamtima, ngati ana anu ali pafupi ndipo mukunena zazing'ono za anthu ena, mwina ndinu zitsanzo zoyipitsitsa zomwe angakhale nazo.
Mwamuna weniweni, bambo weniweni sangaike ana ake kuzinthu zopanda pake zomwe zimapitilira ndi abambo ambiri mgulu lero.
Ndikawona amuna akutsanzira achikulire ena omwe amawononga anthu m'mawu kapena pawailesi yakanema, ndimangogwedeza mutu ndikukhulupirira kuti tsiku lina adzauka.
Chifukwa cha ana awo, ndikhulupilira kuti adzuka ndikukhala amuna enieni m'moyo.
3. Ndiwo chitsanzo choyendera cha kumvera ena chisoni ndi chifundo
Bambo wamkulu kwambiri, amatha kuzindikira zinthu mwachilengedwe, ndipo amatha kuwonetsa ana ake chifundo ndi chifundo kwa nyama yovulala, munthu wopanda pokhala, komanso anthu ena omwe akuvutika m'moyo.
Kukhala achifundo komanso achifundo kumathandizanso osati kubanja lanu lokha, komanso oyandikana nawo, dziko lanu, dziko lanu lomwe liphatikizaponso anthu omwe atha kukhala ndi malingaliro osiyana azogonana kuposa inu, khungu losiyana, komanso kuchuluka kwa ndalama .
Bambo weniweni, mwamuna weniweni adzakhala ndi chifundo ndi chifundo pamaso pa ana awo kwa aliyense amene akuvutika m'moyo.
4. Timasiya kufunika kokonza aliyense
Izi ndi zazikulu. Kwa mibadwo, zaka mazana ambiri, amuna auzidwa ndikulimbikitsidwa kukhala ndi mayankho kwa aliyense amene akukumana ndi zovuta m'moyo.
Kapenanso, amuna awuzidwa kuti apereke malingaliro awo ndikukonzekera anthu ngakhale atakhala kuti safunika kukonzedwa.
Kodi ndiwe? Kodi mumalangiza mkazi wanu pankhani iliyonse m'moyo, ngakhale kuti sanafunsidwepo malangizo anu?
Abambo enieni, amuna enieni sali okonzekera kukonza aliyense, koma abwera kudzatsogolera, kuthandizira ndi kulimbikitsa ana awo ndi wokondedwa wawo kuti akwaniritse zolinga zawo zofunika kwambiri pamoyo.
Kodi ndiwe?
Mukawerenga izi ndipo zimakukwiyitsani, mwina zikutanthauza kuti muli ndi ntchito yambiri yoti muchite kukhala bambo wabwino.
Ngati mungadziyese nokha, ndikuyang'ana mbali zinayi za zipolopolozo ndikuzindikira kuti atatu mwa iwo atulutsidwa paki koma imodzi yomwe mukulimbana nayo, pezani thandizo ndi amene mukulimbana naye.
Mfundo zomveka bwino pamfundozi ndizodziwikiratu, ndipo yankho lake ndikuti ndikhale bambo weniweni, mwamuna weniweni, amene ali wofunitsitsa kuyang'ana pakalilole ndi kuvomereza zolakwa zawo monga ndidachitira pamwambapa, kenako ndikupeza thandizo lowasintha.
Tsogolo la ana anu, lili mmanja mwanu. Athandizeni bwino.
Ntchito ya David Essel'yi imavomerezedwa kwambiri ndi anthu monga malemu Wayne Dyer, ndipo wotchuka Jenny Mccarthy akuti "David Essel ndiye mtsogoleri watsopano wa gulu loganiza bwino."
Marriage.com yatsimikizira David ngati m'modzi mwa alangizi othandizira maubwenzi komanso akatswiri padziko lapansi.