Zamkati
- 1. Chikondi chimabweretsa chimwemwe
- 2. Kugonana kumalimbitsa chitetezo cha mthupi lanu
- 3. Kuchuluka kwachuma
- 4. Chikondi chimabala ulemu
- 5. Mumagona bwino ndi amene mumamukonda
- 6. Kugonana kumachepetsa kupsyinjika
- 7. Chikondi chimakupangitsani kukhala ndi moyo wautali
- 8. Kugonana kumakugwirizanitsani
Pazikhalidwe zonse zomwe zimapangitsa kuti banja likhale labwino, losangalala, chikondi ndizofunikira kwambiri pamndandanda wa anthu onse. Izi zimafotokoza zambiri za mphamvu ya chikondi ndi zomwe ingachite kuti muteteze ubale. Ndizomwe zimapangitsa mgwirizano wabwino kukhala wabwino, ndizomwe zimapangitsa abwenzi kukhala abwenzi abwino.
Kufunika kwa chikondi m'banja kumakhala kosatha. Kupatula apo, ukwati sichinthu chophweka nthawi zonse ndipo popanda chikondi, simudzatha kuyendetsa, chidwi, kudzikonda, ndi kuleza mtima zomwe zimafunikira kuti ubale wanu ukhale wopambana.
1. Chikondi chimabweretsa chimwemwe
Chikondi chimalimbikitsa chimwemwe. Nenani zomwe mungafune kuti mukhale omasuka komanso odziyimira pawokha, palibe chilichonse chonga chitonthozo ndi chitetezo chodziwa kuti mumasamaliridwa.
Mukakhala mchikondi thupi lanu limatulutsa dopamine, mankhwala omwe amatulutsidwa mu "Reward Center" yaubongo. Ndizosadabwitsa kuti dopamine imakupangitsani kuti muzimva kuyamikiridwa, kusangalala, kulandira mphotho, komanso kukulimbikitsani.
Chikondi chimalimbikitsanso kukwera kwa hormone cortisol. Ngakhale izi nthawi zambiri zimalumikizidwa ndikukhala "Stress Hormone", pankhani yakukondana, cortisol sikumakupangitsani kukhala ndi nkhawa koma imayambitsa agulugufe m'mimba mwanu, chisangalalo, komanso chidwi chachikulu chomwe mumakhala nacho mukakhala kupweteka kwa chikondi chatsopano.
Kafukufuku wina akuwonetsa kuti pamene mukukula mchikondi cha agalu ndikukhala achikondi chokhwima, milingo yanu ya dopamine imatha kukhalabe yokwezeka.
2. Kugonana kumalimbitsa chitetezo cha mthupi lanu
Kugonana pafupipafupi ndi wokondedwa wanu kumatha kupindulitsa chitetezo chamthupi. Anthu apabanja amakhala ndi nkhawa zochepa, kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, komanso kuthamanga kwa magazi poyerekeza ndi anzawo omwe sanakwatirane. Matenda amtima amakhalanso ofala kwa iwo omwe amakhala okha kuposa omwe ali pabanja.
3. Kuchuluka kwachuma
Awiri amaposa mmodzi, makamaka pankhani ya akaunti yanu yakubanki! Okwatirana nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi chuma ndipo amakhala ndi chuma chochuluka pakapita nthawi kuposa omwe sanakwatire kapena osudzulana.
Kukhala ndi ndalama ziwiri kumathandiza mabanja kukhala okhazikika pachuma, zomwe zitha kuchepetsa nkhawa, kuchepetsa ngongole, komanso kuloleza kusinthasintha muukwati ngati mnzake atha kugwira ganyu kapena akufuna kukhala panyumba kusamalira ana kapena maudindo ena.
4. Chikondi chimabala ulemu
Ulemu ndiye mwala wapangodya wa ubale wabwino. Popanda ulemu, chikondi ndi kudalirana sizingakule. Mukamva kuti mumalemekezedwa, mumadziwa kuti mawu anu, malingaliro anu, ndi momwe mumamvera zimayamikiridwa. Mutha kudalira momasuka ulemu mukapatsidwa ulemu.
Kufunika kwa ulemu ndi chikondi m'banja kumakhudzanso kulimbikitsana. Mukakhala ndi mnzanu, amene amasamala malingaliro anu ndikukuchitirani zabwino, mumatha kukhala osatekeseka ndikuwadalira. Thandizo lamphamvu limathandizira thanzi lam'mutu komanso ubale wonse komanso chisangalalo.
5. Mumagona bwino ndi amene mumamukonda
Mbali ina yakufunika kwachikondi m'banja? Blanket-hogs ndi snore-hound pambali, mudzagona bwino mukamayamwa ndi chikondi cha moyo wanu. Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti maanja omwe amagona pafupi wina ndi mnzake anali ndi ma cortisol ochepa, amagona mokwanira, ndipo amagona mwachangu kuposa omwe amagona okha.
6. Kugonana kumachepetsa kupsyinjika
Kufunika kwa chikondi m'banja kungathandizenso thanzi lanu lamaganizidwe. Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti kusungulumwa kumatha kuwononga thanzi lanu komanso kumatha kuyambitsa malo opweteka muubongo wanu. Izi zimayambitsa nkhawa.
Chikondi ndi kugonana ndizodabwitsa popewa nkhawa komanso nkhawa. Izi zimachitika pang'ono ndikutulutsa kwa hormone yolumikizana ya oxytocin. 'Mankhwala achikondi' awa ndi omwe amachititsa kuti munthu azigwirizana akamakhudza wina amene mumamukonda, kaya ndichinthu chogonana monga kugonana kapena chotsekemera ngati kugwirana manja.
Oxytocin imachepetsanso kupsinjika ndi kuyeza mphamvu zamagetsi, zomwe zimayambitsa nkhawa komanso kupsinjika.
7. Chikondi chimakupangitsani kukhala ndi moyo wautali
Mabanja amakula mosangalala kuposa ma single, kapena akuti kafukufuku wina wa University of Missouri. Kafukufukuyu, wochitidwa ndi department of Human Development and Family Study, apeza kuti, mosasamala kanthu za msinkhu, iwo omwe ali m'mabanja achimwemwe amati thanzi lawo ndilabwino kuposa anzawo omwe sanakwatirane.
Ubwino winanso wokhala ndi banja losangalala? Sikuti mumangokhala ndi mwayi wokhala ndi moyo wautali kuposa osakwatiwa osasangalala, koma kukhala osakwatiwa, monga momwe zawonedwera mu kafukufukuyu, ndiye amene amatsogolera kufa kwakanthawi kochepa.
Kutalika kwanthawi yayitali ya okwatirana kumaganiziridwa kuti kumakhudzidwa ndimathandizidwe, malingaliro, komanso ndalama zomwe amalandila chifukwa chokhala mbali ya 'banja'. Mwachitsanzo, okwatirana omwe ali ndi mwayi wopeza chithandizo chamankhwala.
Kafukufuku wina ku Harvard adawulula kuti amuna okwatira amakhala nthawi yayitali kuposa amuna omwe banja lawo latha kapena omwe sanakwatiranepo. Izi zikuganiziridwa kuti ndichifukwa choti amuna okwatirana amanyoza moyo wawo (monga kumwa, kumenya nkhondo, ndikuika pachiwopsezo mosafunikira) akakhala pachibwenzi.
8. Kugonana kumakugwirizanitsani
Kugonana koyenera ndi gawo la chikondi m'banja osati kokha chifukwa kumakhala kosangalatsa kukhala pafupi ndi mnzanu mwanjira imeneyi, koma chifukwa kumakuphatikizani pamodzi.
Nthawi zina amatchedwa 'mankhwala achikondi', Oxytocin ndi hormone yomwe imayambitsa kulumikizana yomwe imamasulidwa mukamakhudza mnzanu zomwe mwachilengedwe zimalimbikitsa chikondi, kudzidalira, kudzidalira, ndikuyembekeza.
Kufunika kwa chikondi m'banja sikumatha. Zimabweretsa zabwino zathanzi, kulumikizana kwambiri, moyo wogonana wabwino, komanso kumachepetsa kupsinjika kwa tsiku ndi tsiku ndi nkhawa zammoyo. Popanda chikondi, inu ndi mnzanuyo simukanatha kusangalala ndi ubale wabwino, wathanzi.