“Kodi Ndidzapezanso Chikondi?” Zinthu 20 Zomwe Muyenera Kukumbukira

Mlembi: Louise Ward
Tsiku La Chilengedwe: 10 Febuluwale 2021
Sinthani Tsiku: 1 Kulayi 2024
Anonim
“Kodi Ndidzapezanso Chikondi?” Zinthu 20 Zomwe Muyenera Kukumbukira - Maphunziro
“Kodi Ndidzapezanso Chikondi?” Zinthu 20 Zomwe Muyenera Kukumbukira - Maphunziro

Zamkati

Anthu ambiri amafuna kupeza munthu yemwe amamukonda ndikukhala limodzi, koma anthu ena amavutika kuti apange ubale wabwino. Ngati munakhalapo ndi zibwenzi zingapo zomwe zalephera kapena mukuwoneka kuti simungalumikizane ndi wina aliyense, pamapeto pake mutha kudzifunsa kuti, "Kodi ndidzakondananso?"

Muthanso kuyamba kukhumudwa ndikuganiza kuti, "Palibe amene adzandikonde!" Ngati izi zikumveka ngati inu, pali zinthu zina zomwe muyenera kuziganizira musanaganize kuti simudzakhala opambana kupeza chikondi chomwe mukufuna.

Yesani: Kodi Ndikuwoneka Wovuta Kukonda Mafunso

Kodi ndizotheka kuti simudzapeza chikondi?

Kuvomereza kuti simudzapezanso chikondi, nthawi zina, kumachitika, chifukwa ndizotheka kuti simudzakhazikika pachibwenzi.


M'malo mwake, zidziwitso zochokera ku Pew Research Center zikuwonetsa kuti theka lokha la achikulire azaka za 18 mpaka 44 adakwatiranapo, zomwe ndi zochepa kuchokera pa 60% ya akulu am'badwo uno omwe adakwatirapo.

Zikuwoneka kuti zikuchulukirachulukira kuti anthu asakwatirane kapena kukhazikitsa ubale wanthawi yayitali, chifukwa chake ndizotheka komanso zachilendo kusapeza chikondi.

Yesani: Kodi Ndingapeze Chikondi Liti?

Zifukwa 10 ndizovuta kupeza munthu amene mumamukonda

Kulola chikondi kukupezani kungakhale kovuta, ngakhale mutakhala kuti mumafuna munthu woyipa kwambiri. Ngati mwalephera mobwerezabwereza kupeza chibwenzi chokondana, mwina mumalimbana ndi izi:

1. Simukufuna kuchita ntchitoyi

Ubale uli ndi phindu lake, koma umafuna ntchito.

Popita nthawi, maanja omwe ali pachibwenzi cha nthawi yayitali amakumana ndi mikangano komanso kusiyana malingaliro. Ngati simukufuna kuvomereza mikangano monga yachibadwa ndikugwira ntchito yothetsera kusamvana kwanu, mwina simungapeze chikondi chosatha.


2. Mumawopa kuvulala

Ngati mudapwetekedwa m'mbuyomu kapena simunakhale ndi chitsanzo chabwino cha maubwenzi abwino mukamakula, mungaope kuti kulowa pachibwenzi chachikulu kumakupweteketsani inu.

Ngati ndi choncho, mwina mungachite mantha kudzifotokozera anthu.

3. Pali zinthu zina zofunika pamoyo wanu

Mwinamwake mwakhala mukuyang'ana kwambiri ntchito yanu kapena zolinga zanu zomwe simunapatse nthawi yokwanira kapena kuyesetsa kuti mukhale ndiubwenzi wabwino.

4. Miyezo yanu ndiyokwera kwambiri

Nthawi zina, titha kupanga masomphenya awa m'mutu mwathu wa bwenzi langwiro, ndipo ngati wina walephera m'njira iliyonse, timazindikira kuti sangakhale athu.

Chowonadi ndichakuti palibe munthu wangwiro kapena bwenzi langwiro, ndipo ngati mukugwira anthu kuti azitsatira kwambiri, mwina mungaphonye ubale wachikondi.


5. Muli ndi malingaliro osatheka pazomwe chikondi chimatanthauza

Mukakhazikitsa kumvetsetsa kwanu kokomera chikondi pa nthano zongopeka zomwe zimawonetsedwa pawailesi yakanema komanso makanema, mutha kuganiza kuti simunapeze chikondi pokhapokha mutakhala pachibwenzi.

Kumbukirani kuti maubale onse amakhala ndi mikangano, ndipo sizokayikitsa kuti kufunafuna chikondi chatsopano kumabweretsa chibwenzi chamatsenga.

6. Kuopa kudzipereka kumakupangitsani kufunafuna maubwenzi apamwamba

Mwina mukuopa kuti mungakhazikike pansi ndi munthu wina, chifukwa chake m'malo mofunafuna chikondi, mukuchita zibwenzi kapena kucheza. Kuyanjana kotereku sikuyenera kubweretsa chikondi chosatha.

7. Ndinu oganiza kwambiri

Vuto lina lomwe anthu amathamangira nalo akafuna chikondi ndikulingalira kwambiri.

Mwina simungakhale pachibwenzi ndi aliyense amene sakwaniritsa zofunikira zina, kapena mwina "ma break deal" anu ndi okhwima kwambiri. Ngati ndi choncho, mungafunikire kuti mutsegule pang'ono malingaliro anu kuti mupeze chikondi.

8. Simukufuna kuyesa zinthu zatsopano

Ngati muli okhazikika munjira zanu kotero kuti simuli okonzeka kuyesa chochitika chatsopano kapena kupita kwina, sizokayikitsa kuti mungakumanenso ndi aliyense kuti mudzapeze chikondi.

9. Mwakhala munjira yakusokonekera

Mukakhala mukuganiza kuti, "Ndikungofuna kuti wina andikonde!" mungayambe kudziona kuti ndinu wopanda pake, ndikuganiza kuti simungapeze chikondi.

Izi zitha kukupangitsani kusiya kapena kulephera kupititsa patsogolo phazi lanu, zomwe pamapeto pake zingapangitse uneneri wokwaniritsa zomwe simungakwanitse kupeza chikondi chomwe mukufuna.

10. Mumayembekezera zambiri kuchokera kwa mnzanu

Mwina wina wanu wofunika ali ndi ntchito yopambana ndipo amayesa kukupangitsani kukhala achimwemwe, koma sikokwanira kwa inu.

Ngati mukuyembekezera kuti wokondedwa wanu akwaniritse zosowa zanu zonse ndikukhala angwiro nthawi zonse, mwina simudzapeza ubale wabwino, wachikondi.

Zomwe muyenera kuchita podikirira chikondi

Kodi ndidzapeza chikondi?

Ngati mukufuna kupeza chikondi, ndikofunikira kuti musafulumire, chifukwa mutha kukhala pachibwenzi cholakwika. Chibwenzi cholakwika sichabwino kuposa kukhala nokha, chifukwa chake podikirira kukumana ndi munthu woyenera, pali njira zabwino zomwe mungatenge:

1. Yambirani ntchito yanu

Kukhazikitsa ntchito yolimba ndikukwaniritsa chuma chanu kumakupatsani mwayi wokhala ndiubwenzi wabwino chifukwa mudzakhala ochepera kubweretsa katundu wapa tebulo yemwe angawononge ubale watsopano.

2. Chitani zinthu zosangalatsa

Mukakhala kuti simuli pachibwenzi, muyenera kukhala ndi nthawi yochuluka yochita zosangalatsa zanu, ndiye ino ndi nthawi yoti muzichita zinthu zomwe mumakonda. Mwinanso mungapeze wina yemwe ali ndi zinthu zofanana ndi inu ngati mutenga nthawi kuti muwone zomwe mumakonda.

3. Ganizirani zaumoyo wanu komanso kulimbitsa thupi

Kupita kumalo ochitira masewera olimbitsa thupi kuti mukhale ndi mawonekedwe abwino ndikukhala athanzi labwino kwambiri zitha kukhala zothandiza mukamafunafuna chikondi chatsopano.

M'malo mwake, kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi kumalumikizidwa ndikudzidalira, chifukwa chake kukhalabe achangu kumatha kukuthandizani kudzidalira.

4. Tengani nthawi yoyenda

Kukhala wosakwatiwa sikuyenera kukhala chinthu cholakwika chifukwa kumakupatsani nthawi yoti muziganizira nokha. Ino ndi nthawi yopanga zosangalatsa.

Tengani ulendowu womwe nthawi zonse mumafuna kuti mutenge, kuti mukhale okonzeka kukhazikika mukapeza chikondi chomwe mukufuna.

5. Sinthani mtundu wanu wabwino kwambiri

Palibe amene ali wangwiro, ndipo ubale wathanzi, wachikondi umafuna kuti muvomereze zolakwa za mnzanu. Izi zikunenedwa, ngati muli ndi zizolowezi zoyipa zomwe mukufuna kusintha, ino ndi nthawi yoti muchite.

Kusiya zizolowezi zoipa monga kusuta kapena kulephera kukhala ndi nyumba yoyera kungakupulumutseni ku mikangano mukayamba chibwenzi.

6. Pitani ndi kukacheza

Ngakhale mukusangalala ndi moyo wanu wosakwatiwa, mwina pamapeto pake mukufuna kukhazikika ndikupeza wina. Ngati ndi choncho, muyenera kutuluka ndi kucheza, chifukwa simudzakumana ndi munthu mutakhala pakhomo.

Landirani mayitanidwe kukakhala nawo paphwando ndikulumikizana ndi anthu ena.

7. Limbikitsani anzanu

Mukayamba chibwenzi chambiri, mumakhala ndi nthawi yochepa yocheza ndi anzanu, ndiye ino ndi nthawi yolimbikitsa anzanu.

Anzanu amatha kukhalapo nthawi zonse, mosasamala kanthu kuti maubwenzi anu amtsogolo adzalephera, chifukwa chake ndikofunikira kukhala ndi anzanu apamtima.

8. Unikani komwe muli ndi malo osinthira

Mukamaganiza ngati tsiku lina chikondi chidzakupezani, mungafunike kukhala ndi nthawi yodziyesa nokha.

Ndikosavuta kudzudzula anzathu akale pachibwenzi chathu cholephera, koma mwina mukubweretsa china patebulopo chomwe chimapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kuti chikondi chikupezeni.

Unikani komwe zibwenzi zakale zidasokonekera, kuphatikiza gawo lomwe mudachita, kuti mupewe zolakwika zomwezo mtsogolo.

9. Ganizirani zamankhwala

Ngati mumabweretsa katundu pagome, itha kukhala nthawi yoti muganizire zopita kuchipatala kuti mukwaniritse zovuta zanu musanakhale pachibwenzi.

Tonse tili ndi mbiri, ndipo ngati kuvulala kapena kupweteka kwakumbuyo kukulepheretsani kupeza chikondi, ndikofunikira kuthana ndi izi musanayambe chibwenzi.

10. Phunzirani maluso ena amoyo

Ngati mukufuna chikondi, pamapeto pake mutha kudzakhala kuti mukukhala ndi mnzanu.

Ngati mwaphunzira kale maluso ofunikira pamoyo, monga momwe mungakonzekerere nyumba komanso momwe mungayendetsere ndalama, mudzakhala okonzekera bwino mgwirizano.

Zinthu 20 zofunika kukumbukira mukapeza chikondi chomwe mukufuna

Ngati mukuyembekezera kupeza wina wokondedwa, pali zinthu 20 zomwe mungafune kukumbukira, kuti muthe kudziwa bwino izi:

1. Chikondi choyenera m'maganizo mwanu mwina sichingakhalepo

Zachikondi za Fairytale zimapanga makanema abwino, koma mtundu uwu wachikondi mwina kulibe m'moyo weniweni. Chikondi sichiyenera kufanana ndi zomwe mumawona pa TV kuti zikhale zenizeni komanso zopindulitsa.

2. Ndikofunika kumasuka

Kudzidalira kwambiri kumatha kubwezera, chifukwa mutha kuthamangira pachibwenzi choipa kapena mumakhala ndi nkhawa kwambiri kwakuti simungathe kukakumana ndi anthu.

Khazikani mtima pansi, ndikukhulupirira kuti ngati mukuyenera kukhala ndi munthu wina, zichitika.

3. Chikondi sichingapangitse moyo wanu kukhala wangwiro

Si zachilendo anthu kukhulupirira kuti kupeza munthu wangwiro kumapangitsa moyo kukhala wabwinoko. Ngakhale maubale abwino angabweretse chisangalalo m'moyo wanu, sizingathetseretu mavuto anu onse mwadzidzidzi.

Sikoyenera konse kuti chisangalalo chanu chonse chikhale pa munthu m'modzi, mwina, musayembekezere chikondi kukhala yankho pamavuto anu onse.

4. Muyenera kutenga nawo mbali kuti mupeze chikondi

Ngati mungadabwe kuti, "Ndingapeze bwanji chikondi?

Yankho ndilakuti uyenera kutenga nawo udindowo. Simungayembekezere kukhala chete ndikudikirira kuti chikondi chiziwonekera pakhomo panu.

5. Muyenera kusiya kukhala opanda chiyembekezo

Ndi kwachibadwa kudziona ngati ndiwe wachabechabe ngati zikuoneka kuti sakupeza chikondi, koma kukhala ndi maganizo olakwika kumangowonjezera mavuto.

Ngati mumalankhula zoipa za inu nokha kapena muli ndi malingaliro olakwika, mwina simukopa wina m'moyo wanu.

Onani kanemayu chifukwa chake kuli kofunika kuganiza zabwino za inu nokha komanso momwe zingakhudzire kukuthandizani kuti mudzapitirire moyo:

6. Kukhala kunyumba nthawi zonse sizotheka

Mutha kukhala omasuka kukhala pakhomo pabedi ndi Netflix komanso zakudya zina zamchere, koma simudzapeza chikondi motere. Muyenera kuti mutuluke kunja kwa malo anu abwino kuti mupeze mwamuna kapena mkazi wamaloto anu.

7. Ndikofunika kukhazikitsa maziko olimba nokha

Simusowa kukhala pachibwenzi kuti mukwaniritse zolinga zanu kapena kugula nyumba yanu.

Tsatirani zinthu izi tsopano, ndipo mudzakhala okonzeka kudzipereka ku chibwenzi.

8. Muyenera kuvomereza kuti mukuyenera kukondedwa

Ngati mwakhala mukuvutika kupeza chikondi m'mbuyomu, mwina mumakhulupirira kuti simukuyenera mtundu wachikondi chomwe mukufuna.

Ndikofunikira kuti mupatuke pamalingaliro awa chifukwa chowonadi ndichakuti muyenera kulandira chikondi ndi ulemu zomwe mukufuna.

9. Yakwana nthawi yoponyera lingaliro lanu la chinthu china chofunikira

Podikirira kuti ndikupezeni, chotsani malingaliro aliwonse omwe mungakhale nawo okhudzana ndi omwe amakondana naye.

Palibe amene angakwaniritse ungwiro, ndipo mukakumana ndi chikondi cha moyo wanu, mudzakhala okonzeka kunyengerera ndikuvomera zolakwika zawo komanso zolakwika zawo.

10. Musaope kupempha thandizo

Mwina anzanu amadziwa wina yemwe angakhale woyenera kwambiri kwa inu, kapena mwina wina ku malo ochitira masewera olimbitsa thupi kwanuko amadziwa munthu yemwe akufuna chikondi.

Musaope kudziwitsa anthu kuti muli pamsika woti mukhale pachibwenzi, ndipo pemphani ena kuti akupatseni mwayi wodziwa zomwe zingafanane ndi zomwe amakukondani.

11. Phunzirani kusangalala ndi inu nokha

Ngati mumadalira wina kuti akupatseni chisangalalo, simudzapeza ubale wachikondi, chifukwa palibe amene angakupangitseni kukhala osangalala nthawi zana, ndipo ngakhale wina wanu wamkulu sakhala ndiudindo woonetsetsa kuti mukusangalala nthawi iliyonse.

Phunzirani kukhala osangalala ndi kudzidalira nokha ndikupeza chisangalalo pochita zinthu zomwe mumakonda, ndipo mudzakopa ubale wachikondi.

12. Osangoyang'ana pakukondana

Tsiku lina chikondi chidzakupezani, koma simungayang'ane kwambiri za chikondi chomwe mazira anu onse amagwera mudengu limodzi.

Perekani mbali zina m'moyo wanu, monga ntchito, zosangalatsa, ndi anzanu, chidwi choyenera, ndi chikondi chidzabwera.

13. Pitani kokayenda

Zitha kuwoneka zowonekeratu, koma anthu ena omwe amadzipeza akuganiza, "Ndikungofuna wina wondikonda!" sindinayesepo kuchita chibwenzi.

Kupeza chikondi cha moyo wanu mwina kumafuna khama, ndipo mwina mungafunike kupitako masiku angapo musanapeze masewera oyenera.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Chifukwa Chomwe Chibwenzi Chili Chofunika Muubwenzi

14. Muyenera kusiya kudziyika nokha pansi

Mukakhala mukufunafuna chikondi chatsopano, ndipo palibe ubale womwe ukuwoneka kuti ukutheka, mutha kuyamba kudziimba mlandu, koma ndikofunikira kuti musadziyese pansi.

Nthawi zina anthu awiri samayenerana, ndipo sizitanthauza kuti ndinu wosayenera kukondedwa. Maubwenzi omwe mwalephera amangotanthauza kuti simunapeze munthu woyenera, kapena mwina simunakonzekere kupeza munthuyu.

15. Muyenera kuchita kukhululuka

Aliyense amalakwitsa, chifukwa chake ngati mukufuna kuti chikondi chikupezeni, mungafunikire kukhululukira mnzanu pazolakwitsa zowona m'malo molola cholakwika chilichonse kukhala chifukwa chothetsera chibwenzi chatsopano.

16. Kukhala owona zinthu moyenera kungakhale kofunikira

Ndizokayikitsa kuti aliyense amene mungakumanepo angayang'anire bokosi lililonse pamndandanda wazikhalidwe zomwe mumakonda.

Muyenera kukhazikitsa miyezo yeniyeni ndikuvomera munthu amene akugwirizana nanu ndipo amakwaniritsa zomwe mumakonda.

17. Chikondi pakuwonana koyamba sichingakhale chenicheni

Anthu ena ali ndi "nkhani yachikondi" momwe amakumbukira kuti adalumikizana ndi wokondedwa wawo koma osalembera wina chifukwa choti sizinamveke ngati, "Chikondi pakuwonana koyamba."

Ndizotheka kwathunthu kukondana pakapita nthawi osati nthawi yomweyo.

18. Khalani okonzeka kukambirana nkhani zovuta

Maubwenzi amatha kukhala ovuta ngati zokambirana zovuta zipewedwa.

Ngati mukuyang'ana kuti mupeze chikondi, muyenera kukhala okonzeka kukambirana kusiyana kwamaganizidwe ndikuthana ndi mikangano m'malo moyiyika mkatimo ndikulola mkwiyo ukuyambika.

19. Yesetsani kusangalala ndi njirayi

Kugwa mchikondi kumatanthauza kukhala chosangalatsa, koma ngati mukudzipanikiza kwambiri kuti mupeze imodzi, mutha kupeza kuti imadzetsa nkhawa m'malo mokhala kosangalatsa.

Yesetsani kusangalala ndikusangalala munthawi zabwino.

20. Ganizirani zokhala pachibwenzi ndi munthu wina

Ngati maubale anu onse akale adalephera, mwina mukuyang'ana chikondi m'malo olakwika.

Mwachitsanzo, mwina mukutsata anthu omwe simukugwirizana nawo, kapena mwina mumakhala pachibwenzi ndi munthu yemwe ali ngati inu. Ganizirani za wina wosiyana, ndipo mutha kuzindikira kuti ndinu opambana pakupeza chikondi chomwe mukufuna.

Kuphunzira kudziyesa pawokha pofunafuna chikondi

Chinthu china chofunikira kuganizira mukamafunafuna chikondi ndikofunikira pakudzikonda. Ngati mwadandaula, "Palibe amene adzandikonde!" mwina mwina simunaphunzire kudzikonda nokha.

Mukasowa kudzikonda, simudzatha kukopa anthu omwe amakusamalirani. Khalani ndi chidwi chodzilankhula mokoma mtima, kudziona nokha, ndikusintha malingaliro olakwika omwe mungakhale nawo kuti chikondi chikupezeni.

Mafunso

Anthu omwe amadabwa kuti, "Kodi ndidzapezanso chikondi?" atha kukhala ndi ena mwa mafunso omwe amafunsidwa kawirikawiri:

1. Kodi kuopa kusapeza chikondi kumatchedwa chiyani?

Ngakhale kulibe mantha omwe amadza chifukwa chosapeza chikondi, kuopa kukondana, komwe kungakhale chifukwa chomwe simunapezepo chikondi, kumatchedwa philophobia.

2. Kodi mwayi wopeza chikondi ndi wotani?

Ndizovuta kuwerengera mwayi weniweni wa munthu woti apeze chikondi, koma anthu ambiri aku US akhala ndi mnzake pakati pa zaka 18 ndi 44, kunena kuti mwayi wopeza chikondi umakukondani mukayika poyesetsa.

3. Kodi uyenera kukhala ndi zaka zingati usanakondane?

Palibe zaka zenizeni "zoyenera" kuti apeze chikondi, ndipo makamaka, anthu ambiri amadikirira mpaka pambuyo pake m'moyo kuti apeze chikondi.

Anthu ena amatha kupanga malamulo ndikudziuza okha kuti ayenera kukhazikika ndikukwatiwa ndi msinkhu winawake, koma ndizabodza kuti simungapeze chikondi mukakalamba.

4. Ndi zinthu ziti zomwe zingalepheretse munthu kupeza chikondi?

Ngati mukuganiza kuti, "Kodi ndidzakondananso?" pakhoza kukhala zotchinga zina zomwe zikukuyimirani.

Zinthu zina zomwe zitha kulepheretsa munthu kuti apeze chikondi ndi monga kukhazikitsa miyezo yokwera kwambiri, kukhala ndi ziyembekezo zosatheka za chikondi, kuwopa kukhumudwa, kuopa kudzipereka, kapena kusafuna kuyika ntchito kuti athetse kusamvana ndikukwaniritsa mpaka kalekale. chikondi.

5. Mukudziwa bwanji kuti simudzapezanso chikondi?

Ngati maubale anu alephera mobwerezabwereza, ndipo mumakhala ndi malingaliro okondana m'maganizo mwanu, kapena simukufuna kutsitsa miyezo yanu ndikulandira mnzanu wopanda ungwiro, mwina simungapeze chikondi.

6. Kodi nkwabwino kusapeza chikondi?

Pamapeto pake, ndizovomerezeka kuti musakhazikike pansi ndikupeza chikondi.

Ngati muli ndi zina zofunika pamoyo wanu, monga kuchita zomwe mumakonda kapena kupititsa patsogolo ntchito yanu, chikondi sichingakhale choyambirira.

Palibe cholakwika ndi kusankha kukhala wosakwatira kwamuyaya, bola ngati mukusangalala ndi makonzedwewo. Kumbali inayi, ngati mukuda nkhawa kuti palibe amene adzakukondeni, pali zina zomwe mungachite kuti mupeze chikondi.

Mapeto

Palibe vuto kusankha kukhala mbeta, koma ngati mungadzifunse kuti, “Kodi ndingapeze bwanji chikondi?” mungafunike kusintha zina ndi zina kuti mupeze mpata wabwino wokhala ndi ubale wabwino.

Anthu ambiri amafuna kukhala ndiubwenzi wokondana, koma nkhani zodzipereka, miyezo yayikulu, ndi ziyembekezo zosatheka zitha kusokonekera. Mwamwayi, pali njira zosinthira malingaliro anu kuti muchite bwino pakupeza chikondi chomwe mukufuna.