Zamkati
- Kuphunzira malingaliro atsopano kuti mupindule ndi mnzanu
- Kuthetsa zoopsa zilizonse zomwe zimapangitsa kuti musinthe
- Ngati mwakonzeka, Nazi zomwe muyenera kudziwa
- 1. Kukonzanso mtima
- 2. Fikirani
- 3. Chikhulupiriro
- 4. Konzani
Munakwanitsa kusunga zochitika zanu zachinsinsi. Ndipo mumakhulupirira kuti nthawi zonse mumatha kuteteza mnzanu kapena abale anu kuti asadziwe zolakwika zanu. Ndiye iwe unagwidwa. Zimachitika.
Tsopano muli ndi njira zingapo zoti muganizire.
Mutha kuchoka paubwenzowu ndikukhala ndi zomwe mwakhala mukubisa kwanthawi yayitali. Kwa ena, ichi ndi chinthu choyenera kuchita. Zokonda zanu zogonana komanso moyo wanu zimayenera kutuluka bwino mu chipinda. Mukudzichitira nokha ndi mnzanu chisomo posayesanso kukhala ngati simuli.
Kapena mutha kupitiliza ndimphamvu zomwezo kunyumba. Mavuto odabwitsa, moyo wapawiri, masewera amalingaliro, komanso kuganiza kuti njovu yomwe ili mchipinda ichokapo.
Kuphunzira malingaliro atsopano kuti mupindule ndi mnzanu
Ngati mukuwerenga izi, mwina chifukwa mukufuna kumupezanso. Nkhaniyi ikuthandizani kudziwa zomwe muyenera kuchita chaka chamawa. Ndikukuchenjezani kuti iyi ndi ntchito yayikulu yosinthira zinthu. Chonde dziwani kuti izi ndi zomwe mukufuna musanagwiritse ntchito nthawi ndi ndalama zofunika.
Nkhani yabwino ndiyakuti maanja ambiri omwe asankha kukhala limodzi amatha kutero. Pogwira ntchito molimbika, amatuluka phulusa ndikupitilira kukhala ndiubwenzi wolimba kuposa momwe amawonera kutheka.
Nkhani yoyipa ndiyoti ntchito siyofanana. Muyenera kuchita zambiri kuposa mnzanu.
Sizokhudza kulangidwa kapena kuweruzidwa. Mtima wamavuto ndikuti zomwe mumachita sizinaphatikizepo kuvomereza kwake. Inu simunamuike iye.
Kuti mumubwezere kumbuyo muyenera kuyang'ana pakuphatikizidwa. Kuphatikizidwa kumatanthauza kukhala ndi malingaliro atsopano. Zimafunikira kuti muphunzire njira ndi njira zatsopano. Ndipo zimaphatikizapo kuvomereza zokumana nazo zatsopano za inu nokha.
Kuthetsa zoopsa zilizonse zomwe zimapangitsa kuti musinthe
Chidziwitso chanu chidzasintha mukamamupambananso. Izi zimachokera pazinthu zitatu: kudziletsa, mgwirizano wodalirika, ndikuchotsa zovuta zilizonse zomwe zimayambitsa chizolowezi chanu.
Ngati mwakonzeka, Nazi zomwe muyenera kudziwa
- Kukonzanso mtima
- Fikirani
- Trust nyumba
- Konzani
1. Kukonzanso mtima
Kuzindikira kuzolowera kugonana kuli ngati ndalama. Ili ndi mbali yokhotakhota. Othandizana nawo ali ndi malingaliro otsutsana chifukwa akutengera zochitika ziwiri zosiyana. Ntchito yanu ndikumvetsetsa ndikuwongolera malingaliro osiyanasiyana. Ichi ndiye chinsinsi chofunikira kwambiri kuti mupambane.
Chododometsa ndikuti wokondedwa yemwe wapusitsidwayo ayenera kukambirana zomwe zidachitika, ndipo wokonda chiwerewere satero.
Ngati simupeza izi, kuyanjananso kwanu kudzakhala kofooka. Nyumba yanu ndi chipinda chanu chogona chidzakhala poizoni ndi mkwiyo womwe ukukula, mkwiyo wosachedwa kupsa, komanso Ice Age yamaganizidwe ndi kugonana.
Mavuto amabwera ngati zosowa zanu zotsutsana sizikumvetsetsedwa ndikunyalanyazidwa. Ngati anyalanyazidwa, kufunikira kwake kukalankhula kumabwera ngati kumangokhalira kufunsa mafunso, osasiya kuyimitsa, kuzungulirazungulira komwe kumatsatiridwa ndi mkwiyo woyaka moto, kukayikira kosalekeza, ndikuyesera kuwongolera chilichonse chomwe mungachite.
Ichi ndi njira yabwino kwambiri yopezera chikondi chotayika.
Zomwe muyenera kudziwa ndikuti chidani chonsechi chimayendetsedwa ndi chinthu chimodzi: kudalira kwake kwa inu.
Tsatirani malangizo apa kuti mumuthandize kumva kukhulupiriridwa kwakukulu komwe amayenera kulandira. Mukamaliza bwino, mikangano yanu yozizira idzakula ndikukondana kwambiri, ndipo nonse nonse mutha kugawana chaka chochokera pansi pamtima.
Polimbana ndi manyazi anu, manyazi anu, ndi liwongo lanu, mutha kuyesedwa kuti mumutsekeretu pamene akufuna kuyankhula, poganiza kuti kungolankhula kumangokulitsa.
Ngakhale zolinga zanu zili zabwino, njira yanu amatchedwa miyala yamiyala, ndipo ndi njira ina yatsoka.
Ngati mukufuna kugumula khoma pakati panu kenako ndikugwiritsa ntchito miyala ija kuti mupange mlatho wokoma wachisangalalo chosatha, chinthu choyamba ndikuti musinthe mawonekedwe.
Muyenera kukhala ofunitsitsa kusinthana:
- hubris za kudzichepetsa
- chinyengo cha ulemu
- ulamuliro kusamalira
- gulu lankhondo
Ngakhale kusintha kwamalingaliro kumeneku kumamveka kosavuta, kukhalabe ndi ntchito. Khalani panjira mpaka mutapeza zotsatira!
2. Fikirani
Pali "zotuluka" zisanu zomwe muyenera kupanga. Yoyamba itatu ndi chithandizo, upangiri, ndi chithandizo chambiri.
Mudzafunika aliyense mlangizi wokhudzana ndi zakugonana pawokha, kuphatikiza wachitatu kwa inu monga banja.
Chifukwa chiyani? Ulendo wanu ukhala wosavuta komanso wachangu. Anthu atatu omwe salowerera ndale atha kulimbitsa ubale wanu kupitilira dambo lomwe lili patsogolo panu, ndikukuyitanani nonse pazinthu zanu. Perekani chaka chabwino kuti muwone kusintha kwenikweni komanso kupita patsogolo kwakukulu.
Magulu othandizira monga Sex Addicts Anonymous ndiofunikanso.
Mufunikira mphamvu zabwino pakadali pano, ndipo magulu amakupatsani. Mutha kumvera kwa ena omwe akhala pomwe muli ndikulankhula zazomwe mukumana nazo mopanda chiweruzo. Yambitsani kugula gulu lanu pa saa-recovery.org
Chachisanu kufikira ndi mnzanu.
Zili pa inu kuti musonyeze kuti mumamukonda. Ndikutcha kuti Reach Out of Care and Kindness (ROCK). Inde, muyenera R-O-C-K ubale wanu.
Izi zikutanthauza kupanga nthawi zanthawi zonse zochezeka. Simukukambirana mavuto, kapena chisoni chanu, kapena mkwiyo wake. Sungani mopepuka komanso mopanda mawu. Kutikita mafupa pang'ono, kumupangira khofi, maluwa sabata. Chilichonse chophweka chomwe chimakusiyani nonse kumva kulumikizana pang'ono.
Ngati simukudziwa choti muchite, mufunseni zomwe angafune.
3. Chikhulupiriro
Maubwenzi onse abwinobwino amakhala okhulupirirana.
M'magulu onse achikulire chidaliro chimapezedwa, kapena chimangoperekedwa. Kudalira kosaphunzira kapena kopanda malire kumangoperekedwa muubwana ndipo ndimphamvu ya kholo ndi mwana. Chifukwa choti malingaliro athu adakhazikitsidwa muubwana, nthawi zambiri mosazindikira timaganiza kuti malamulo omwewo amagwiranso ntchito pamaubwenzi achikondi achikulire.
Timakhulupirira kuti anzathu ayenera kutidalira mosagwirizana. Cholakwika!
Ntchito yanu ndikupitiliza kukulitsa chidaliro munjira zomwe zingafanane ndi zomwe mudachita kale.
Zomangira zodalira zimaphatikizapo kupewa kuchita zomwe mumakonda koma ndizochulukirapo kuposa izi. Sizothandiza kuti, "Wokondedwa, ndikulonjeza kuti ndasiya kusuta, kuti undikhulupirirenso." Muyenera kuchitapo kanthu. Ngati chizolowezi chanu chakhala zaka zambiri, khalani okonzeka kulola kuti pakhale chaka chimodzi chomangirira kuti muyambe kutsimikizira kuti ndinu odalirika.
Pali njira zisanu zokulitsira kudalirana. Muyenera kugwiritsa ntchito zisanu zonse pamipata iliyonse kufikira zitakhala zizolowezi. Zindikirani ngati awa akumva kukhala opanda pake komanso opanda pake, kapena ngati mumadzimva wokwiya kapena kuchita nawo mwano mukamawerenga.
Izi ndizofala, koma zosathandiza. Khalani nawo iwo. Zikhala zosavuta ndipo mupeza zotsatira.
- Kuyankha
- Zosasintha
- Kuzindikira
- Kulankhulana
- Kumvetsera
4. Konzani
Tuneup wamaganizidwe ndikulowerera kwambiri m'mabala omwe pachimake amakhala osokoneza bongo.
Zilonda zazikulu ndizopweteka, zopweteka zomwe zidachitidwa kwa inu, nthawi zambiri muli mwana.
Mwina simunalumikizanepo zaka zanu zoyambirira ndi chizolowezi chanu, koma zam'mbuyomu nthawi zambiri zimathandizira pakukula kwa chizolowezi chogonana. Muyenera kumvetsetsa kulumikizanaku chifukwa kutero kudzakuthandizani kuti musakhale oganiza bwino, osavuta.
Mukachiritsa mabala akale am'maganizo, simumayendetsedwa ndi zikhumbo ndipo mumakhala omveka bwino komanso odekha.
Mumachitanso izi chifukwa mnzanuyo amafunika kudziwa kuti mulibe maziko amisala. Sangakukhulupirire ndipo sayenera kukukhulupirira pokhapokha utamaliza Tune up yamaganizidwe. Izi zimafuna kugwira ntchito ndi katswiri waluso.
Ndikulangiza othandizira omwe adaphunzitsidwa moyenera pakugonana, Relational Life Therapy (onani terryreal.com), ndi Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (onani mdria.site-ym.com).
Kumeneko muli nacho, mapu otsimikiziridwa oti mupange mgwirizano wanu kumalo abwinoko.
Magulu anu omwe akubwera ndi chithandizo chiziwonetsa uthenga womwewo, ndizosiyana ndi zomwe ndanena. Dzipatseni nthawi. Simuyenera kuyembekezera kukhala wamkulu ndi maluso awa kwakanthawi. Muyenera kukhala ofunitsitsa kuchita A-C-E.
- Maganizo - khalani omasuka kuphunzira zaulendo wa banja lanu.
- Ogwirizana - osasinthasintha kuti mupeze zotsatira zomwe mukufuna.
- Yesetsani - ndi zomwe mumaphunzira. Dziwani zomwe zimagwira bwino ntchito ndikuchita, kuchita, kuchita.
Ndikufunirani zabwino zonse komanso chisangalalo.