Kodi Mumadziwa Bwanji Ngati Mumakonda Wina

Mlembi: John Stephens
Tsiku La Chilengedwe: 23 Jayuwale 2021
Sinthani Tsiku: 1 Kulayi 2024
Anonim
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Kanema: It’s dark,its dry, why?

Zamkati

Palibe chosangalatsa kuposa kumangogwera wina. Agulugufe m'mimba mwanu, kulakalaka kuti mulankhule nawo kapena kukhala nawo, komanso zosayembekezereka muyenera kupeza njira zatsopano zowasangalatsira.

Mukayamba kukondera wina, zotere zimatha kukhala zapadera ndipo pamakhala kumverera komwe kumakhala kovuta kwambiri kufotokoza.

Ndipo ngakhale zitha kumveka ngati mukukondana, sizimakhala chikondi nthawi zonse. Koma mungadziwe bwanji ngati mumakonda winawake kapena mukungotengeka? Pitilizani kuwerenga kuti mupeze.

Chikondi ndi chiyani?

Chifukwa chiyani anthu amadabwa nthawi zonse tanthauzo la chikondi, kodi kukhala mchikondi kumamveka bwanji, ndipo mumadziwa bwanji kuti mumakonda munthu wina?

Chikondi chafotokozedwa m'njira zosiyanasiyana.


Buku lotanthauzira mawu la Oxford limatanthauzira chikondi ngati "Magawo olimba komanso osangalatsa amalingaliro ndi malingaliro, kuyambira pamakhalidwe abwino kwambiri kapena chizolowezi chabwino, chikondi chakuya pakati pa anzanu mpaka chisangalalo chosavuta."

Agiriki akale amatanthauzira mitundu isanu ndi iwiri ya chikondi, yomwe ndi: Storge, Philia, Eros, Agape, Ludus, Pragma, ndi Philautia.

Chikondi chingatanthauzidwenso ngati chinthu chachilengedwe chomwe sitingathe kufunsa kapena kuyitanitsa. Titha kuvomereza koma sitingathe kulamula; ndikumverera kwakukulu komwe kumakulira kuposa wina aliyense.

Chifukwa chiyani ndikofunikira kudziwa ngati muli pachibwenzi?

Monga momwe mumamverera kapena momwe mukumvera, kuzindikira ngati mukukondana ndi wina kapena ayi ndikofunikira.

Sikovuta konse kukhala mumkhalidwe wosadziwa ngati mumakonda wina kapena ayi.

Mutha kukhala munthawi yomwe wina wanena kuti amakupembedzerani; komabe, simudziwa ngati ndinu wokonzeka kuthana ndi zotere.


Kapenanso munthu amene mumamupembedzayo watsala pang'ono kusamukira ku chibwenzi ndi munthu wina, ndipo muyenera kufotokoza momwe mukumvera isanakwane.

Komabe, mungadziwe bwanji kuti zomwe mukuwona kuti ndi zenizeni, zosatha, komanso zomveka?

Chikondi chimaposa momwe timamvera mmoyo wathu.

Ndichinthu chomwe timapangira miyoyo yathu mozungulira, timasunthira dziko lapansi, ndikuyamba mabanja.

Chifukwa chake, zimakhala zofunika kwambiri kumvetsetsa ngati zomwe mukumva ndizo chikondi kapena mtundu wina wa chilakolako kapena kutengeka.

Kusiyana pakati pa chilakolako, kutengeka, ndi chikondi

Chilakolako, kutengeka, ndi chikondi nthawi zambiri zimakhala zovuta kusiyanitsa, makamaka kumayambiriro kwawo. Amakhala ndi mawonekedwe ofanana kwambiri koyambirira ndipo, kwazaka zambiri, akhala akupusitsa anthu.

Komabe, ndi osiyana kwambiri wina ndi mnzake, ndipo tiyenera kumvetsetsa kusiyana kumeneku kuti tipewe kupanga zisankho zomwe tingadandaule nazo.


Chilakolako ndikutengeka kwamaganizidwe komwe kumabweretsa chidwi chachikulu cha chinthu kapena munthu. Ndi mphamvu yakanthawi yayitali yomwe imafuna kuti ikwaniritsidwe popanda chifukwa kapena malingaliro.

Monga chilakolako, kutengeka ndikumakhudzika mtima komwe kumatipangitsa kuti tikhale ndi chilakolako chosaganizira, nthawi zambiri kwa munthu wina yemwe timamukonda kwambiri.

Kusiyana kwake kuli chifukwa chakuti kutengeka kumatha kukula mu chikondi, pomwe kulakalaka ndikungofuna kwodzipezera zomwe mukufuna.

Mbali inayi, chikondi chimathandizira kuyanjana pakati pa anthu ndipo chakhala chikugwirizanitsidwa ndi kukopa kwamphamvu ndi zokonda zamaganizidwe.

Kuti mumvetse bwino kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kusilira tengani 'Kodi Ndili M'chikondi kapena mafunso a chilakolako?'

Komanso, yang'anani nkhani yotsatirayi ya TED pomwe Dr. Terri Orbuch pulofesa wa maphunziro azachikhalidwe ku University of Oakland komanso pulofesa wofufuza ku Institute for Social Research ku University of Michigan akukambirana za zizindikiritso zosiyanitsa pakati pa chilakolako ndi chikondi, ndi momwe angayambitsire chilakolako chonyansachi. muubale wa nthawi yayitali.

Mukudziwa bwanji kuti mumakonda winawake?

Kudziwa ngati mukukondana kungakhale kovuta. Ambiri amvetsetsa, pomwe ambiri sangakhale ndi mwayi wonena. Koma ukudziwa bwanji kuti umakonda munthu wina?

Kuti muzindikire chikondi chenicheni, muyenera kuyang'ana kaye momwe mumamuwonera munthu amene mumamukondayo, mumawachita ngati chinthu kapena munthu. Chikondi ndikumverera komwe kumakupangitsani kuvomereza zolakwa za wina popanda kuwafunsa kuti nawonso achite zomwezo.

Si lingaliro la kukhala ndi umwini; M'malo mwake, ndi mtundu wongodzipereka popanda chifukwa chifukwa mumulandiradi munthu ameneyo popanda kuyembekezera kubwezeredwa chilichonse.

Zikumveka mopambanitsa? Chifukwa zili choncho, ndichifukwa chake zomwe ambiri a ife tingakwaniritse muubwenzi wathu ndizosakanikirana ndi chilakolako, kutengeka, ndi chikondi.

Chifukwa chake, tibwerera ku funso lomwelo, mukudziwa bwanji kuti mumakonda winawake?

Mwamwayi, thupi lanu lili ndi njira zina zakudziwitsira ngati mukukondana ndi wina kapena ayi.

Kukuthandizani kumvetsetsa momwe kukhala mchikondi kumamvekera, gawo lotsatirali likuwonetsa zizindikilo zina zomwe mwina mungakhale mukukondana.

Zizindikiro 16 kuti mumakonda

M'munsimu muli njira zomwe mungauze kuti mumakonda wina:

1. Umangoyang'anitsitsa

Mukadzipeza mumawayang'ana kwa nthawi yayitali, ndiye kuti chitha kukhala chizindikiro kuti mukumukonda munthu ameneyo.

Nthawi zambiri, kuyang'anizana ndi diso kumatanthauza kuti mukukonzekera zinazake.

Ngati mukuyang'ana wina kangapo, muyenera kudziwa kuti mwapeza wokondedwa.

Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti anzawo omwe amapezeka kuti akuyang'anizana amakhala ndi chibwenzi. Ndipo, izi ndi zoona. Simungayang'ane munthu wina pomwe mulibe naye chidwi.

2. Mumadzuka ndi kupita kukagona ndi malingaliro a iwo

Mukudziwa bwanji kuti mumakonda winawake?

Mukakhala pachibwenzi, nthawi zambiri mumaganizira za munthu amene mumamusamalira, koma koposa apo, ndiye lingaliro lanu loyamba m'mawa komanso lingaliro lomaliza musanagone.

Kuphatikiza apo, mukamakonda winawake, iwonso ndi anthu oyamba omwe mumaganizira zouza ena nkhani.

3. Mukumva bwino

Nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kudziwa ngati mumakonda wina kapena ayi. Ichi ndichifukwa chake anthu ambiri amangokhala ndi funsoli, udziwa bwanji kuti umakonda winawake.

Nthawi zambiri, mukamakondana ndi munthu wina, mumadzimva kuti ndinu wapamwamba, ndipo sizachilendo kwa aliyense.

Kafukufuku woyesa kuyesa kufanana pakati pa kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo ndi chikondi cha pakati pa amuna ndi akazi adapeza kuti pali kufanana kwakukulu pakati pazoyambira zachikondi komanso chizolowezi chomwa mankhwala osokoneza bongo.

Tsopano, ngati simukudziwa chifukwa chake mwakhala mukuchita momwe mukuchitiramu, ichi ndiye chifukwa chake mukuyamba kukondana.

4. Mumaganizira za munthu nthawi zambiri

Mukayamba kukonda ena, mosakayikira - simusiya kuwaganizira.

Chifukwa chomwe mumaganizira za wokondedwa wanu watsopano ndikuti ubongo wanu umatulutsa phenylethylamine - yomwe nthawi zina imadziwika kuti "mankhwala achikondi."

Phenylethylamine ndi hormone yomwe imathandizira pakupanga kumverera pakati pa inu ndi mnzanu.

Ngati simunadziwepo izi, muyenera. Phenylethylamine imapezekanso mu chokoleti chomwe mumakonda.

Chifukwa chake, ngati mumamwa chokoleti tsiku lililonse, ndiye kuti mwina ndi chifukwa chake simungaleke kuganizira za mnzanu watsopanoyo.

5. Nthawi zonse mumafuna kuwawona akusangalala

Mwakutero, chikondi chiyenera kukhala mgwirizano wofanana. Mukamakonda winawake, mumamva ngati mukufuna kuti azikhala osangalala nthawi zonse.

Ndipo, mwina ngati simukudziwa, chikondi chachifundo ndi chisonyezo chakuti mukukhala pachibwenzi chabwino. Izi zikutanthauza kuti mutha kuchita chilichonse chomwe mungafune kuti mnzanu akhale wachimwemwe nthawi zonse.

Chifukwa chake, ngati mungadzipezere nokha chakudya m'malo mwa mnzanu pomwe ali otanganidwa ndi ntchito zake, muyenera kudziwa kuti mukuyamba kukondana.

6. Mumapanikizika chifukwa chakuchedwa

Nthawi zambiri, chikondi chimalumikizidwa ndi malingaliro osowa, koma kamodzi kanthawi, mudzapeza kuti mwapanikizika.

Mukakhala pachibwenzi, ubongo wanu umatulutsa hormone yotchedwa cortisol, zomwe zimakupangitsani kuti mukhale opanikizika.

Chifukwa chake, ngati muzindikira kuti mukuzengereza kubwera mochedwa, akudziwa chifukwa cha chibwenzi chatsopano. Koma osasiya chifukwa cha izi. Kupsinjika ndikwachizolowezi muubwenzi.

7. Mumamva nsanje

Kukondana ndi winawake kumatha kuyambitsa nsanje, ngakhale mwina simungamve nsanje. Kukondana ndi winawake kumakupangitsani kufuna kukhala nawo nokha, chifukwa chake nsanje pang'ono ndiyachilengedwe, bola ngati siyokonda.

8. Mumawayika patsogolo pazinthu zina

Kupatula nthawi ndi wokondedwa wanu ndi mphotho pakokha, chifukwa chake mumayamba kuziyika patsogolo pazinthu zina.

Mukamacheza nawo, m'mimba mwanu mumati, "Ndimakonda kutengeka uku" ndikukhumba zambiri, kukukakamizani kuti musinthe mapulani anu ndikuwayika patsogolo.

9. Mukuyamba kukonda zinthu zatsopano

Mukayamba kukondana, mudzapezeka kuti mukuchita zinthu zomwe simunazolowere kuchita. Mwachitsanzo, ngati simunakonde kuwonera mpira, mnzanu watsopanoyo akhoza kukupangitsani kuyamba kuwonera.

Ngati muzindikira kuti mukupatsa moyo njira ina, simuyenera kuda nkhawa chifukwa mukuyamba kukondana.

10. Nthawi imathamanga mukakhala nawo

Kodi mwakhala kumapeto kwa sabata limodzi, ndipo mwadzuka Lolemba m'mawa mukuganiza kuti masiku awiri amayenda bwanji?

Tikakhala pafupi ndi munthu amene timamukonda, timakhala otanganidwa kwambiri kwakanthawi, ndikupangitsa kuti maola azingodutsa osazindikira.

11. Mumawamvera chisoni

Mukamakondana ndi winawake, mukumvera ena chisoni ndipo mukuyesetsa kuthandiza mnzanu.

Kuwachitira zinthu kumakhala kosavuta chifukwa mumafuna kuti azimva bwino, ndipo mumatha kuzindikira kupsinjika kwawo.

12. Mukusintha kukhala abwinoko

Anthu ambiri amati, 'Ndikuganiza kuti ndili mchikondi' pomwe theka lawo lina limawalimbikitsa kuti asinthe machitidwe awo abwino.

Izi zikutanthauza kuti mulimbikitsidwa kuti musinthe chifukwa mukufuna, ngakhale amakulandirani momwe mulili.

13. Mumakonda ma quirks awo

Anthu onse ali ndi mawonekedwe apadera. Chifukwa chake, mukayamba kukondana ndi wina, mudzazindikira kuti mwasankha zina zochepa zomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala apadera, ndipo sizachilendo.

Muyamba kumva kuti mukufuna kutsanzira momwe amalankhulira, momwe amayendera, ndipo mwina momwe amasekera nthabwala.

Zinthu zoterezi zimapangitsa kuti ubale ukhale wolimba. Zowonadi, zingawoneke ngati zopanda pake, koma zimawononga ubale wanu.

14. Mukuganiza za tsogolo limodzi

Nthawi yomwe anthu ambiri amazindikira ndikuvomereza kuti 'Ndikuganiza kuti ndimakukondani' ndipamene azindikira kupanga mapulani amtsogolo limodzi ndikusankha mayina a ana mobisa.

Ndiye, mumadziwa bwanji kuti mumakonda winawake?

Kuti muyankhe funsoli, dzifunseni kuti, mudayamba kale, ndipo mpaka pati, mumaganizira tsogolo lanu limodzi.

15. Mumalakalaka kukhala pafupi ndi thupi

ngati mukufuna kuwonetsetsa kuti mukukondana musanatuluke ndi "Ndikuganiza kuti ndimakukondani," werengani zosowa zanu zakukhudzana ndi mnzanu.

Ngakhale timakonda kukumbatirana komanso kukhala pafupi ndi anthu omwe timawakonda, monga abwenzi ndi abale, tikakhala mchikondi, kumverera kofuna kukhudzana ndi thupi ndikosiyana.

Zimakutengerani, ndipo mumayang'ana mwayi uliwonse wokhala pachibwenzi ndi munthu amene mumamukonda.

16. Kukhala nawo kumakhala kosavuta

Ubale uliwonse umabwera ndi zovuta zake zokha komanso mikangano. Palibe njira yozungulira icho.

Komabe, mukakhala mchikondi, choyambirira ndicho ubalewo, osati kunyada kwanu.

Chifukwa chake, ngakhale mutha kukangana nthawi zina, chibwenzi chanu sichimawoneka kukhala chosavuta kusunga, ndipo mumasangalala kukhala nawo.

Womba mkota

Kodi funso ndi lakuti: udziwa bwanji kuti umakondanso munthu wina akukupatsa mavuto? Kudziwa ngati mukukondana ndi munthu wina kungakhale kovuta, koma mutha kudziwa ndi zizindikilo zomwe zili pamwambapa.