Zamkati
- Muyenera kudzikonda nokha musanakonde ena
- Muli ndi udindo wachimwemwe chanu
- Onetsetsani kuti mukuyembekezera ubale wanu
- Kukwatiwa ndi munthu amene mumamukonda
- Zimatengera awiri kuti akondane
- Chikondi chimayenera kumva ngati kuyendetsa galimoto ndi mabuleki
- Tsatirani zofuna zanu
- Akakuwonetsani kuti ndi ndani, mukhulupirireni
- Zotsutsa zimatha kukopa
- Nthabwala ndizofunikira
- Simuyenera kukhala limodzi 24/7
Kodi sizingakhale zabwino kukhala pansi ndi gulu la mabanja osangalala, maanja omwe onse anali kukondwerera tsiku lokumbukira ukwati (werengani 30, 40 ngakhale 50 zaka zachisangalalo chaukwati) ndikukhala ndi mwayi wowafunsa upangiri wachikondi? Kukhala wokhoza kupeza upangiri kuchokera kwa anthu omwe angaganizire pazaka zakukhala ndi maukwati achimwemwe? Ingoganizani? Takuchitirani inu! Nazi zina mwa mfundo zazikuluzikulu za zokambiranazo; mawu anzeru omwe mungaganizire, kuchokera zokumana nazo za "akulu anzeru". Konzekerani kuphunzira kuchokera ku zokumana nazo!
Muyenera kudzikonda nokha musanakonde ena
Rita, wazaka 55, akufotokoza chifukwa chake kudzikonda ndiko chinthu chofunikira kwambiri mgwirizanowu. “Anthu omwe samadziona kuti ndi oyenera amakonda kukopa anzawo omwe angamvere nawo izi. Chifukwa chake amaphatikizana ndi anzawo omwe amawatsutsa kapena kuwazunza kapena kuwapezerera. Samaganiza kuti akuyenera chilichonse chabwino chifukwa sanaphunzire kudziona kuti ndi ofunika. ” Ngati muli ndi zovuta zodzidalira kapena mumachokera komwe mudazunzidwa kapena kunyalanyazidwa, ndibwino kuti mugwire nawo ntchito pamavuto awa ndi mlangizi. Kukulitsa chidziwitso chokwanira chanu chofunikira ndikofunikira kuti mukope anthu athanzi, achimwemwe m'moyo wanu.
Muli ndi udindo wachimwemwe chanu
Kupanga mnzanu kukhala gwero lokhalo lokhalira achimwemwe ndi njira yatsoka. Mark, 48, amakumbukira ali ndi zaka makumi awiri ndipo amatha kuwotcha ubale wawo mwachangu. “Ndinkayembekezera kuti mkazi yemwe ndinali naye pachibwenzi atha kupsinjika kwanga ndikukhala ndi moyo wosangalala. Ndipo pamene samatero, ndimasamukira kwa mkazi wotsatira. Zomwe sindimamvetsa ndikuti ndimayenera kupanga chisangalalo changa. Kukhala ndi mkazi m'moyo wanga kungakhale chisangalalo chowonjezera, koma osati gwero lokhalo la izi. ” Mark atazindikira izi, adayamba kuyang'ana kwambiri kuchita zinthu zomwe zimamusangalatsa. Anayamba kuthamanga ndikupikisana m'mipikisano yakomweko; adatenga makalasi ophika ndikuphunzira momwe angapangire chakudya chamadzulo chodabwitsa. Anakhala zaka zingapo yekha, akumanga umunthu wosangalala woyambira, ndikusangalala ndikukula kwake. Pambuyo pake atakumana ndi mkazi wake (kudzera mu kalabu yake yothamanga), adakopeka ndi mawonekedwe ake akumwetulira ndikumwetulira, osanenapo kuphika kwake kokoma.
Onetsetsani kuti mukuyembekezera ubale wanu
Chikondi chenicheni sichimawoneka ngati kanema waku Hollywood. Sharon, wazaka 45, adasudzula mwamuna wake woyamba atangokwatirana zaka zochepa. “Anali munthu wabwino koma ndinali ndi lingaliro loti mamuna ayenera kukhala ngati m'makanema. Mukudziwa, mundibweretsere maluwa usiku uliwonse. Ndilembereni ndakatulo. Lemberani ndege yabwinobwino kuti izinditenga kumapeto kwa sabata modzidzimutsa. Ndinakulira momveka bwino ndimaganiza kuti chikondi chiziwoneka bwanji, ndipo banja langa loyamba lidavutika. ” Mwamwayi, Sharon adafufuza mozama atasudzulana ndipo adagwira ntchito ndi wothandizira kuti amuthandize kuzindikira kuti chikondi chenicheni chimapangidwa bwanji. Atakumana ndi mwamuna wake wachiwiri, adatha kuzindikira zizindikiritso zenizeni zakukhala athanzi, achikulire. “Samandigulira diamondi, koma amandibweretsera khofi wanga momwe ndimaukondera m'mawa uliwonse. Nthawi iliyonse ndikamwa, ndimakumbutsidwa kuti ndili ndi mwayi wokonda mwamunayo komanso kukhala naye pamoyo wanga! ”
Kukwatiwa ndi munthu amene mumamukonda
Aliyense m'gululi adatsimikiza zakukonda kwawo onse awiri ndipo kukonda munthu amene mudzakwatirane naye: “Kugonana kumabwera ndikudzakwatirana. Mudzakhala nazo zambiri pachiyambi. Ndiye ana, ndikugwira ntchito, komanso zaka ... zonsezi zidzakhudza moyo wanu wogonana. Koma ngati muli ndi ubwenzi wolimba, mudzatha. ” Ngati chibwenzi chanu chimazikidwa makamaka pa zokopa zakugonana, mudzayamba kunyong'onyeka. Mukayamba kukondana, dzifunseni ngati mungasankhe munthuyu kukhala bwenzi lanu, ngakhale simungagone nawo? Ngati yankho lanu ndi "inde" wolimba, pitani patsogolo molimba mtima. Monga Pat, wazaka 60, akuti: "Zikuwoneka ngati zikutha. Makhalidwe anga adzakhalapo nthawi zonse. ”
Zimatengera awiri kuti akondane
Jack, wazaka 38, amakonda upangiri wosavutawu. “Ndinayamba chibwenzi kangapo. Vutolo? Ndine ndekha amene ndinkakonda, ”akutero. "Pambuyo pake ndinazindikira kuti sichikondi kwenikweni pokhapokha tonsefe tikamamverera 100%." Mutha kukhala ndi ma crushes komanso malingaliro osafunsidwa, koma awa siwoyanjana ndipo sayenera kuwonedwa choncho. Zindikirani kusiyana pakati pa mgwirizano wokhala mbali imodzi ndi ubale womwe ndiwothandizana komanso wokondana. “Ngati simukuwona kuti mnzanuyo amakukondani monga momwe mumakondera, tulukani. Sichikhala bwino, ”Jack akulangiza motero. "Ndidataya nthawi yambiri ndikuyesera 'kupangitsa' akazi kundikonda. Nditakumana ndi mkazi wanga, sindinkafunika kugwira ntchitoyo. Amandikonda monga ndinali, pomwepo, pomwepo. Monga momwe ndimamukondera. ”
Chikondi chimayenera kumva ngati kuyendetsa galimoto ndi mabuleki
Bryan, wazaka 60: “Inde, mudzakumana ndi mavuto amene mufunika kuthana nawo, koma banja lanu siliyenera kukhala ngati ntchito.” Ngati muli ndi munthu woyenera, mumakumana ndi mavuto limodzi, osati monga adani koma monga anthu amtundu umodzi. Kuyankhulana kwanu ndi kwaulemu komanso kopanda ntchito. Mabanja omwe akhala nthawi yayitali onse anena chimodzimodzi: ndi wokondedwa wokondedwa, ulendowu ndiwosalala ndipo ulendowu ndi wosangalatsa. Ndipo mumafika pamalo amodzi pamodzi.
Tsatirani zofuna zanu
"Poyamba tinali ngati choko ndi tchizi, ndipo tidakali ngati choko ndi tchizi patatha zaka makumi anayi," akutero a Bridget, a zaka 59, namwino wobadwira ku London. “Zomwe ndikunena ndikuti sitinakondweretse zambiri tikakumana. Ndipo tiribe ambiri. Amakonda masewera ampikisano, ndipo sindinathe kukuwuzani malamulo a mpira waku America. Ndimakonda mafashoni; sakanadziwa kuti Michael Kors kapena Stella McCartney ndi ndani. Komabe, zomwe tili nazo ndi chemistry. Taseka pamodzi kuyambira pachiyambi pomwe. Tili okondwa kukambirana zochitika zapadziko lonse lapansi. Timalemekezana ndipo timapatsana nthawi ndi malo ochitira zinthu zathu, kenako timadya chakudya chamadzulo ndikukambirana chimodzi mwazomwe timakonda. ”
Akakuwonetsani kuti ndi ndani, mukhulupirireni
Laurie, wazaka 58 anati: “Chinthu chimodzi chimene ndikulakalaka ndikazindikira kuti chinali chofunikira, ndi chakuti sungasinthe zikhulupiriro zazikulu kapena moyo wa munthu wina.” Ndinkaganiza kuti ndingasinthe malingaliro a Steve pankhani yokhala ndi ana. Amawoneka bwino kusewera ndi ana a mchimwene wanga tikapita kukacheza nawo. Anali ndi makhalidwe abwino ambiri. Tinakwatirana ndili ndi zaka 27, ndipo ndimaganiza zakumbuyo kuti asintha malingaliro ake ofuna kukhala bambo. Anali ndi mikhalidwe yambiri yabwino: nthabwala, mwaukadaulo anali pamwamba pantchito yake, ndipo amandichitira zabwino osayiwala tsiku lofunika. Komabe, pa ana, samangogwedezeka. Ndinali ndi zaka zapakati pa makumi atatu pamene ndinazindikira kuti zaka zanga zobala ana zatha. Ndinkakonda Steve, koma ndimafuna kukhala mayi. Tinakhala mwamtendere koma titatha. Ndidadziwa kuti ndikufuna kukhala kholo, ndipo ndidatsimikiza ndikayambiranso chibwenzi, kuti anzanga amamva chimodzimodzi. Ndine wokondwa modabwitsa tsopano ndi Dylan. Ana athu atatu amachititsa moyo wathu wonse kukhala waphindu. ”
Zotsutsa zimatha kukopa
"Mukukumbukira nyimbo yakale yokhudza nazale yokhudza Jack Sprat? Mukudziwa, imodzi yokhudza ukwati wa zotsutsana? Inde, ameneyo ndi ine ndi Bill, atero Carolyn, wazaka 72. Anapitiliza kuti: “Bill ali ndi zaka zisanu ndi zinayi ndipo ine ndine mmodzi. Chifukwa chake mwakuthupi pali pafupifupi phazi ndi theka kutalika kwathu, koma izi sizinatilepheretse kukhala akatswiri ampikisano wa kanyumba kathu! Zaka zisanu zikuthamanga tsopano! "Carolyn adayamba kutchula zosiyana zina:" Ndiwotopetsa, ndipo nthawi zambiri amabweretsa homuweki. Ine? Ndikatuluka mu ofesi, ndimachoka mu ofesi. Amakonda kusodza kwamadzi akuya. Sindimakonda ngakhale kudya nsomba zambiri. Koma mukudziwa chiyani? Ndimakonda kutenga nsomba zomwe wazigwirazo, kuziwatulutsa, kuponyera pang'ono vinyo woyera, kumaliza ndikuwaza parsley, ndikukhala pansi kuti tidye nawo. Ndipo zili chimodzimodzi ndi ife: timathandizana wina ndi mnzake m'malo mokhala ndi zofanana. Tidakali ndi zokonda zambiri zosiyana, koma Ogasiti wotsatira tidzakhala okwatirana zaka makumi asanu. Ndimayamikira zomwe amakonda ndipo nayenso amasangalala ndi zanga. ”
Nthabwala ndizofunikira
"Timangoseka ndikuseka," adatero Bruce akumwetulira. Anapitiliza kuti: “Tidakumana mugiredi la 10. Zinali m'kalasi ya algebra. Lady Luck anali kumbali yathu. A Perkins, aphunzitsi athu, adapangitsa kuti makalasi awo onse azikhala motengera zilembo. Dzina lake lomaliza linali Eason, ndipo langa ndi Fratto. Zinali zamtundu wa Mr. Perkins yemwe adatibweretsa zaka makumi asanu mphambu ziwiri zapitazo. Adatembenukira kwa ine tsiku loyamba lija ndikuseka nthabwala. Ndipo tonse takhala tikuseka chiyambireni pamenepo! ” Zachidziwikire kuti kuseka ndi mkhalidwe wokongola komanso wofunikira. “Ndikhoza kukhala wosasangalala, ndipo Grace azindikira ndikunena nthabwala. Nthawi yomweyo, mtima wanga wasintha ndipo ndinayambanso kumukonda. ” Chifukwa chake kuseka kwalimbitsa ukwati uwu wazaka khumi kuphatikiza kuphatikiza. Ayenera kukhala oseketsa omwe anali mawu ofala kwambiri pama mbiri azibwenzi, koma posachedwa pakhala kusintha.
Simuyenera kukhala limodzi 24/7
"Ndikudziwa kuti banja lathu lidzamveka ngati sitikuonana, koma zimathandiza," adatero Ryan. "Ndine woyendetsa ndege ndipo ndimakhala masiku pakati pa khumi mpaka khumi ndi asanu pamwezi kunyumba, ndipo Lizzie amakonda kukhala panyumba." Ryan adatumikira mu Gulu Lankhondo, ndipo atakwanitsa zaka makumi awiri, adalowa nawo ndege yapadziko lonse lapansi, komwe wangomaliza kumene chaka chake cha makumi awiri. “Ndinakumana ndi Lizzie patali pang'ono ku Manila. Anali ndi kunyezimira m'maso mwake, ndipo ndimangodziwa kuti ndi iwowo. ” Lizzie analankhula za msonkhano wawo kuti, "Poyamba sindinakhulupirire zachikondi, koma ndidamuyang'ana Ryan, ndipo inenso, ndimadziwa kuti ndi ameneyo. Tinakwatirana patatha miyezi iwiri. Ndinapitako ku America kale, koma sindinaganize kuti ndidzakhala kuno. Ndimagwira ntchito yowerengera ndipo tili ndi ana awiri azaka zaku koleji. Chomwe chimapangitsa banja lathu kuyenda bwino ndi chakuti tonse timasangalala pantchito yathu, timakhala ndi nthawi yocheza ndipo Ryan akakhala kunyumba, amakhaladi panyumba, ndipo timakhala nthawi yayitali limodzi. ” Ryan anawonjezera, "Ndipo ulemu. Ndimalemekeza kwambiri Lizzie. Ndikudziwa kuti adachita zambiri kuposa gawo lake polera ana athu aamuna. Anasiya achibale ake ndi anzawo kuti akayambe ukwati wathu ku United States. ”
Ndiye mwapita: Mawu anzeru ochokera kwa omwe akhala m'banja kwanthawi yayitali
Maganizo osiyanasiyana, palibe amatsenga omwe angakhale osangalatsa muukwati, malingaliro osiyanasiyana pazomwe zimagwira ndi zomwe sizigwira ntchito. Sankhani pazomwe akatswiri athu agawana, ndikusinkhasinkha pazomwe mukuwona kuti zikuthandizani kuti mukhale ndi banja lalitali komanso losangalala.