Zamkati
- 1. “Ndikuopa zomwe zichitike ndikachoka.”
- 2. “Sizoipa kwenikweni.”
- 3. "Tiyenera kukhala limodzi kuti tizisamalira ana."
- 4. "Sindingathe kupeza ndalama ngati nditachokapo."
- 5. “Ndikuyembekezerabe kuti zinthu zisintha.”
- 6. “Sindingavutike chifukwa chosudzulidwa.”
- 7. "Ndili ndi zambiri zoti nditaye."
Monga momwe kusankha kukwatira ndi gawo lalikulu, momwemonso kusankha kutha. Ngakhale zinthu sizikuyenda momwe mumayembekezera komanso momwe mumalotera, nthawi zambiri sichinthu chophweka kuti muthe kusiya.
Chifukwa chake zomwe zimachitika ndikuti anthu amakhala ndi kusunga kukhala muubwenzi wosasangalala kapena kupitiriza kukhala m'banja losasangalala.
Aliyense wozungulira banjali atha kuwona kuti banjali likukhalabe muubwenzi wosasangalala, koma nthawi zambiri banjali palokha limatha kupeza zifukwa zonse zokhalirabe, kapena mwina zifukwa zosasiya ubale wosasangalala.
Nkhaniyi ifotokoza zifukwa zisanu ndi ziwirizi zomwe mabanja osasangalala amakhalira limodzi kapena chifukwa chake anthu amakhala m'mabanja osasangalala.
Ngati muli pachibwenzi chosasangalala, mutha kuzindikira zina mwazomwezi, ndipo mwina izi zingakupatseni kumvetsetsa ngati kukhalabe pachibwenzi chosasangalatsa kuli koyenera komanso ngati zinthu zikuyenera kusintha pakapita nthawi kapena ayi.
1. “Ndikuopa zomwe zichitike ndikachoka.”
Chifukwa choyamba chomwe maanja amakhala m'mabanja osasangalala ndi "Mantha".
Mantha osavuta komanso osavuta mwina ndi chifukwa chachikulu chomwe chimapangitsa kuti anthu azigwidwa. Uku ndikumverera kwenikweni komanso kovomerezeka, makamaka pankhani yakuopa zosadziwika. Mantha akasiya kusayang'aniridwa, amatha kukula pamlingo wokulira.
Kwa iwo omwe ali m'mabanja ankhanza, ndizodziwika bwino kuti wokwatirana wokwiya atha kubwezera, zomwe zitha kuwonongera mnzake amene wathawa. Ndiye amadzipeza ali m'malo momwe alili mu banja losasangalala koma sangachoke
Nthawi zonse pamakhala chiopsezo chothetsa chibwenzi, ngakhale sichisangalatsa. Chifukwa chake sindikusankha kutengedwa mopepuka, koma kuyeza mosamala poona zomwe mungasankhe.
Dziwani zomwe mukuwopa m'modzi ndikuyesera kuti mantha akukhala pachibwenzi chosasangalatsa pamoyo wanu wonse athe kupitilira ena.
2. “Sizoipa kwenikweni.”
Kukana ndichinyengo chomwe mumakonda ngati mukufuna kudziwa momwe mungakhalire okwatirana mukakhala osasangalala.
Ngati mungonamizira kuti sizoyipa kwambiri, mwina mumva bwino. Kupatula apo, maubale onse amakhala ndi zovuta zina, ndiye mwina banja lanu ndilabwino basi ndipo simuli ngati banja lina losasangalala?
Mwinanso sizowopsa 'momwe mungapitirire kupitilizabe. Koma mwina pali liwu laling'ono kwinakwake pansi mkatikati, likusunthika kuti limveke pamene akuti 'zowonadi momwemo siziyenera kukhalira?'
Ngati mukumva choncho, yambani kufufuza. Funsani mozungulira ndi anzanu ndi omwe mumadziwa momwe ubale wawo ulili.
Mwina mudzadabwa kuzindikira kuti zina mwazimene zikuchitika mbanja mwanu sizili "zachilendo", ndipo sizodabwitsa kuti ndinu osasangalala.
3. "Tiyenera kukhala limodzi kuti tizisamalira ana."
Ngakhale mutayesetsa kubisa izi, ana anu adziwa ngati simuli okondwa ngati banja. Ana amakhala tcheru kwambiri ndipo amazindikira, ndipo amawoneka kuti ali ndi radar yapadera kwambiri yokhudzana ndi phokoso kapena chinyengo.
Ngati mukuyesera kuwaphunzitsa kuti "ukwati ndiwabwino komanso wachimwemwe" mukamakhala ndi moyo, "Ndimadana ndikakhala ndi kholo lanu linalo, ndipo ndikulitenga" musayembekezere kuti amve uthenga.
Mosakayikira adzazindikira kuti "banja lililonse silikhala losangalala, chifukwa chake nanenso tsiku lina ndidzadzipereka."
Onetsetsani mosamala ngati ana anu atha kukhala limodzi ngati simukhala limodzi sichikusokonezedwa kapena kusowa mtendere chifukwa chosowa chikondi chenicheni komanso mkhalidwe wankhanza m'nyumba mwanu.
4. "Sindingathe kupeza ndalama ngati nditachokapo."
Chuma ndi chifukwa china chachikulu chomwe chimapangitsa mabanja osasangalala kukhala limodzi. Mukachoka, mwina muyenera kutsitsa moyo wanu, ndipo simudzatha kusangalala ndi moyo womwe mwazolowera.
Mwinamwake mnzanuyo wakhala akupereka ndalama zambiri, ndipo kuchoka kudzatanthauza kuti muyenera kuyambiranso ntchito pambuyo pa zaka zambiri zakunyumba.
Umenewu ndi chiyembekezo choopsa chomwe chimatha kubweretsa kukayikira kwakukulu. Kapenanso mwina mumalipira kale chisamaliro ndi ndalama za banja lomwe mudasudzulana kale, ndipo simungakwanitse kugula mtanda wina pamwamba pake.
Izi ndi nkhawa zenizeni zomwe zimafunikira kuganizilidwa mozama.
5. “Ndikuyembekezerabe kuti zinthu zisintha.”
Ndizabwino chiyembekezo, ndipo ndizomwe zimatipangitsa kuti tithe kudutsa zovuta zambiri. Koma ngati mumadzichitira moona mtima, kodi mungaonedi zosintha zilizonse, ngakhale zazing'ono, muubwenzi wanu?
Kapena mukumenyananso chimodzimodzi mobwerezabwereza? Kodi mwawonapo mlangizi kapena wothandizira? Kapena mkazi kapena mwamuna wanu amakana kupempha thandizo chifukwa inu ndi amene muyenera kusintha, osati iwo?
Zitenga chiyani ku bweretsani kukonza ubale wanu, ndipo ndinu okonzeka kudikira nthawi yayitali bwanji pamene mukukhala mu chibwenzi chosasangalala?
6. “Sindingavutike chifukwa chosudzulidwa.”
Ngati mukuchokera kuchikhalidwe chosasamala pomwe mawu oti 'kusudzulana' ndi pafupifupi mawu olumbirira, ndiye kuti lingaliro lodzudzula wekha lingawoneke ngati chinthu choyipitsitsa chomwe chingachitike.
Mwanjira ina mungaganize kuti mukasudzulana, 'D' wamkulu wofiira amawonekera pamphumi panu kulengeza kudziko lonse lapansi kuti banja lanu lalephera.
Izi sizowona, ndipo mwamwayi masiku ano, manyazi osudzulana akutha msanga.
Zowonadi, chisudzulo ndichinthu chodzichepetsa kwathunthu palimodzi, koma mukadziwa kuti mukukuchitirani, zilibe kanthu kuti ena angaganize kapena kunena chiyani.
7. "Ndili ndi zambiri zoti nditaye."
Ili ndiye funso lofunikira lomwe muyenera kukhazikitsa m'malingaliro anu. Tengani pepala ndikujambula mzere pakati.
Mu gawo loyamba, lembani zomwe mudzataye mukachoka, ndipo m'danga lachiwiri, lembani zomwe mudzataye mukakhalabe. Tsopano yang'anani mosamala mizati iwiriyo kuti muwone mbali yolimba kwambiri.
Sizokhudza kuchuluka kwa mawu kapena zolemba. M'malo mwake, pangakhale gawo limodzi lokha mgawo lachiwiri loti 'kukhala wamisala.' Kutengera ndi njira ziti, muyenera kupanga chisankho.
Kenako pitani patsogolo ndikutsimikiza komanso kutsimikiza mtima, osayang'ana kumbuyo.