Zamkati
- 1. Njira zothandizirana ndi mabanja
- 2. Chithandizo chamaganizidwe abwino kwa maanja
- 3. Njira ya Gottman
- 4. Malangizo okhudzana ndi maukwati ndi maanja
- 5. Uphungu waumwini
- 6. Mankhwala ofotokozera
- 7. Chithandizo cha ubale wa Imago
- 8. Njira yolowera zamagetsi
- 9. Uphungu wozindikira
Mukamva mawu akuti "upangiri wa maanja," kapena "njira zothandizira maanja”Ndi chiyani chomwe chimabwera m'maganizo mwanu? Mwina mumaganizira za banja lomwe likusemphana, litakhala pakama ndikulankhulana ndi mlangizi wa maukwati.
Mwina ndi momwe upangiri wazokwatirana umawonekera, koma kodi mumadziwa kuti pali njira zingapo?
Chinthu choyamba chomwe muyenera kuchita mukamaganiza zopangira upangiri kwa okwatirana ndikupeza mlangizi wabwino wamaukwati.
Uphungu uliwonse wa mabanja ndiwosiyana, mtundu wa njira zoperekera upangiri ndi wosiyana, ndipo banja lililonse limakhala losiyana, chifukwa chake kupeza wofanana ndikofunikira.
Mlangizi wabwino wa maukwati adzakhala ndi chidziwitso chothandiza maanja kuthana ndi mavuto awo, ndipo adziwa njira kapena njira zosiyanasiyana zomwe zitha kugwiritsidwa ntchito moyenera.
Pali mitundu yambiri ya njira zothandizira maanja / njira / njira. Kuphunzira za chilichonse chomwe chingakhale chopindulitsa mukamalandira chithandizo cha maanja.
Nazi zina mitundu yosiyanasiyana yamankhwala othandizira maanja ndi mitundu ya upangiri waukwati:
1. Njira zothandizirana ndi mabanja
Njira yothandizirayi idapangidwa ndi Dr. Susan Johnson ndi Les Greenberg. Monga momwe dzinalo likusonyezera, kutengeka mtima kumachita gawo lalikulu pano.
Ndiwothandiza kwambiri ndipo imagwiritsidwa ntchito padziko lonse lapansi. Ndizothandiza kwambiri ngati kukhumudwa ndi gawo limodzi laubwenzi.
Njirayi imagwiritsa ntchito chiphatikizo, kapena lingaliro kuti monga anthu tikufuna kulumikizana. Koma nkhani zitha kuchitika ndikusinthasintha kukhala kusachita bwino.
Mtundu uwu wa njira zothandizira maanja imathandiza maanja kuthana ndi malingaliro olakwikawa ndikulimbitsa banja lawo.
2. Chithandizo chamaganizidwe abwino kwa maanja
Kuphatikiza pa kutengeka mtima, njirayi yothandizira maanja imayang'ana kwambiri pazabwino. Zowonadi, kwa ena, ndikusintha kwakukulu pamalingaliro, zomwe zimatha kusintha malingaliro ndi machitidwe, omwe atha kukonza ubalewo.
Mu psychology yabwino, mumaphunzira kusangalala monga momwe zimachitikira ndikuganizira chisangalalo pakadali pano. Izi zimathandiza maanja kuzindikira nthawi zachisangalalo zomwe ali nazo pakadali pano, kenako amatha kukulirapo.
Kulemba m'magazini ndikugawana ndi wothandizira ndi gawo lofunikira pa njirayi.
3. Njira ya Gottman
Ndi zaka 30 kumbuyo kwake, ambiri amakhulupirira kuti zatsimikizira kuti ndi njira yabwino yolangizira mabanja. Ngati inu ndi mnzanu mukumvana kwambiri ndipo mukuwoneka kuti simukugwirizana, iyi ikhoza kukhala njira yabwino pachibwenzi chanu.
Njira yothandizira maanja iyi imakuthandizani kumvetsetsana monga inu kambiranani modekha.
Imagwiritsa ntchito china chake chotchedwa "mamapu achikondi" chomwe mumamanga. Zimakuthandizani nonse kuphunzira za wina ndi mnzake mukamapeza zinthu zomwe zimawapanikiza, zimawapangitsa kukhala osangalala, ndi zina zambiri.
Ponseponse, njira ya Gottman imayang'ana pakuwongolera mikangano, moona mtima pamtima.
4. Malangizo okhudzana ndi maukwati ndi maanja
Ngati muli m'gulu lachipembedzo, onani kuti ndi mitundu iti ya uphungu yomwe imapezeka mu mpingo wanu. Popeza chipembedzo chanu ndichofunikira kwambiri muukwati wanu, uphungu woterewu ungakuthandizeni.
Muthanso kumva bwino mumkhalidwe wamtunduwu, womwe ungathandize kukhazikitsa gawo lakuchira.
Njira zimasiyanasiyana, koma chithandizo chazachipembedzo chamabanja chimayitanitsa zinthu zauzimu zomwe mwina mumakhulupirira kale ndikukhala kuti zikuthandizireni kuthana ndi zovuta.
5. Uphungu waumwini
Ngati m'modzi mwa okwatirana sangathe kapena akufuna kulandira chithandizo cha maanja, ndiye kuti mnzake wofunitsitsa komanso wokhoza ayenera kulingalira zokhazokha. Wothandizira amatha kuthandiza mnzake kuthana ndi mavuto kumapeto kwake.
Zachidziwikire, ngati mnzake sakufuna kuthetsa vutolo, ndiye kuti chibwenzicho sichingathe kupita patsogolo.
Komabe, pakupita kwa ena kukalandira upangiri waumwini, nthawi zina mnzakeyo amalimbikitsa pang'ono pang'ono malingaliro kenako kenako amaphatikizana ndi akazi awo kuti akalandire chithandizo cha maanja.
6. Mankhwala ofotokozera
Nthano kumatanthauza nkhani, ndipo makamaka ndiyo gawo la njira yothandizira maanja. Mudzafotokoza nkhaniyi ndikupanga "nkhani" ya zomwe zikuchitika. Komano, muzigwirira ntchito limodzi kuti mulembenso mbali zosasangalatsa za nkhaniyi.
Chinthu chabwino pa izi Njira yothandizira awiriwa kodi zimathandiza banjali kuti lisiyane ndi nkhaniyi, kuzindikira kuti nkhaniyi sikutanthauza kuti ndinu anthu.
Zimaphunzitsanso kuti nkhaniyi ndiyosintha. Nonse mutha kulembanso nkhani yanu yamtsogolo limodzi.
7. Chithandizo cha ubale wa Imago
Yopangidwa ndi Harville Hendrix ndi Helen Lakelly Hunt, mankhwala amtunduwu amayang'ana kwambiri zauzimu ndi machitidwe.
Imago ndi liwu lachilatini lotanthauza "chithunzi," ndipo mtundu uwu wamankhwala umayesa kuthandiza maanja kuzindikira momwe ubongo wawo umagwirira ntchito ndikuwona momwe akukhalira mosazindikira.
Kwenikweni, njira yothandizira maanja awa akuti timasankha othandizana nawo omwe angachiritse zomwe zikusowa kuyambira ubwana wathu, ndipo mabala amenewo azibwerezedwanso ndi mnzathu.
Mwa njira iyi yothandizira maanja, maanja phunzirani kugwira ntchito limodzi ndikulankhulana kudzera muzinthu.
8. Njira yolowera zamagetsi
Chithandizo chamtunduwu chimakhala chothandiza kwambiri ngati anzanu amachita mosagwirizana, omwe amakhulupirira kuti amabadwa ndi zochitika pamoyo wawo komanso zokumana nazo ali mwana.
Mwachitsanzo, ngati kuzunzidwa kunali gawo lakale la munthu, zimatha kubweretsa nsanje ngakhale palibe chifukwa chochitira zimenezo.
Munjira yamtunduwu, mlangizi akuthandizani kuti muziyang'ana pazu wa vutoli, lomwe nthawi zina silimazindikira ndipo limakhala vuto la anthu awiri kapena awiri.
Zikuthandizani kuzindikira zowona zenizeni za zochitika zam'mbuyomu zomwe zikupanga machitidwe apano.
9. Uphungu wozindikira
Wopangidwa ndi Bill Doherty, ku Yunivesite ya Minnesota, uphungu woterewu makamaka kwa maanja omwe mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo akutsamira kusudzulana ndipo winayo sali.
Njira yothandizira maanja iyi imawathandiza kudziwa zomwe munthu aliyense akufuna, komanso ngati chibwenzicho chili chopulumuka. M'malo mothetsa mavutowa, imawunika ngati kuthekera kuthekadi. Ndi njira yachidule.
Chithandizo chokwatirana ndi njira yabwino kwa mabanja omwe akuyang'ana kuthetsa kusamvana kwawo mothandizidwa ndi mlangizi wophunzitsidwa bwino.
Pali njira zambiri zochiritsira maanja, njira, ndipo njirayi itengera mlangizi wamaukwati komanso zovuta zomwe zikuchitika mchibwenzi cha awiriwa.
Ndicho chifukwa chake nthawi zonse kumakhala kofunikira kusankha mlangizi wabwino wazokwatirana yemwe nonse mumamasuka naye komanso omwe mumamukhulupirira.